Tag: just for fun

Thoughts on history of the entire world, i guess

There’s this really fantastic video on YouTube that’s been making the rounds, and if you’ve found any of my discussions of history interesting (like this one, which I need to do a followup on), you’ve probably either seen or are going to really love it:

Some thoughts/reactions:

  • That’s actually one of the most fascinating explanations of the Big Bang theory that I’ve ever seen. Kind of makes me wonder: was anyone (like God, perhaps) there to witness it? Because I imagine it would be very much like that.
  • It’s interesting how we start out jumping billions of years every minute, but by the end, it takes half a minute or so to cover just one decade.
  • Meso-American history really doesn’t fit into the narrative in any way. Even China is part of the story from the beginning, and connects in a distant but relevant way to all the stuff going on everywhere else. But until the Spanish arrive in the Americas, it’s just “oh look, some big heads. Must be the Olmecs,” or “the Mayans have figured out the stars!” But who are the Mayans? Who are the Olmecs? They kind of come out of nowhere.
  • Technically, money wasn’t invented until after the bronze age collapse, but whatever.
  • Did 9/11 happen so soon after the internet was invented? I guess it was. Doesn’t seem like that, since I remember checking the news online every day. In fact, I was tracking Al Qaeda at the time, with the Kenyan embassy bombings and the USS Cole attack. Still remember where I was when those happened. And I was really upset that we weren’t doing anything to stop Osama Bin Laden. Then 9/11 happened and everything changed.
  • If you watch closely, you can tell which way Bill Wurtz leans on some issues (especially toward the end). But it’s still a really fun overview of history/science/religion anyway.
  • My single biggest criticism is that there isn’t an easy way to get rid of all the profanity. I would love to share this with my nieces and nephews!

With apologies to Abraham Lincoln

Four score n’ seven muthafuckin years ago our fathers brought forth on dis continent, a freshly smoked up nation, conceived up in Liberty, n’ all bout tha proposizzle dat all pimps is pimped equal.

Now we is engaged up in a pimped out civil war, testin whether dat nation, or any hood so conceived n’ so dedicated, can long endure. We is kicked it wit on a pimped out battle-field of dat war. Shiiit, dis aint no joke. Our thugged-out asses have come ta dedicate a portion of dat field, as a gangbangin’ final restin place fo’ dem playas whoz ass here gave they lives dat that hood might live. Well shiiiit, it be altogether fittin n’ proper dat we should do this.

But, up in a larger sense, we can not dedicate — we can not consecrate — we can not hallow — dis ground. Y’all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! Da brave men, livin n’ dead, whoz ass struggled here, have consecrated it, far above our skanky juice ta add or detract. Da ghetto will lil note, nor long remember what tha fuck we say here yo, but it can never forget what tha fuck they did here, so peek-a-boo, clear tha way, I be comin’ thru fo’sho. Well shiiiit, it is fo’ our asses tha living, rather, ta be dedicated here ta tha unfinished work which they whoz ass fought here have thus far so nobly advanced. Y’all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! Well shiiiit, it is rather fo’ our asses ta be here all bout tha pimped out task remainin before our asses — dat from these honored dead we take increased devotion ta dat cause fo’ which they gave tha last full measure of devotion — dat our crazy asses here highly resolve dat these dead shall not have took a dirt nap up in vain — dat dis nation, under God, shall gotz a freshly smoked up birth of freedom — n’ dat posse of tha people, by tha people, fo’ tha people, shall not perish from tha earth.

Made with Gizoogle Textilizer. I am so sorry.

On the way to 10k

A couple of weeks ago, I wrote about how I plan to achieve my writing goal of hitting 10k words of fiction in a single day. The steps I laid out to getting there were:

  1. Write first thing every day.
  2. Write in timed, focused sessions.
  3. Strive to achieve 2k words per hour.
  4. Strive to hit at least 6 writing sessions.
  5. Pre-write each day for the next day.

I’m happy to report that the writing has been coming along very well! Ever since I started timing my sessions and keeping track of how much and how fast I write, it’s been as if someone turned on a switch inside my brain. The words are flowing, the story is coming along very well, and I’m a lot happier and more productive than I was only a month ago.

The main thing that does it is, ironically, forcing myself to stop every half hour or so. When I wake up in the morning and thing of how much I want to write that day, it can be a little daunting. By writing in short bursts, it helps to break the big goal down into parts. When you think too much about all the writing you want to achieve, it’s very easy to get caught up in the procrastination trap. But when you think of it as just a half-hour session of 400-600 words, it seems a lot more doable. And it is!

So things are coming along very well with Gunslinger to the Stars. My goal is to finish the first draft by February 6th and send it out to my first readers shortly thereafter. If things keep going the way they have been, I may actually finish it sooner.

As for reaching 10k words, I’m still a ways off but headed in the right direction. For now, I’m laying the foundation for it: building good habits and hitting a consistent stride. Once I’ve got that laid out, I’ll start to stretch myself, pushing the limits further and further until I’m ready to make the final approach to the summit. No sense in pushing too hard and burning out along the way.

In other news, I’ve sent Captives in Obscurity (Sons of the Starfarers: Book V) off to my editor, and should be getting it back in early February. The cover art should be ready around the same time. If all goes well, the book should be up for pre-order by the end of February, with a release date of May 15th.

I’m not sure when Patriots in Retreat (Book VI) will come out, since I’m still writing it, but as of right now I’m tentatively planning for a release sometime in August. After I’ve finished with Gunslinger to the Stars, I’ll move on to Patriots and see if I can’t knock that out before the end of February. If so, I might actually push the release date up to July.

As for other WIPs I intend to tackle, The Sword Keeper and Edenfall are on the top of the list. The free month for Genesis Earth went a lot better than I had expected, leading me to believe that there’s enough potential to make finishing the trilogy worthwhile. Besides, Edenfall is already plotted out, so if I can keep up the 10k pace it should be a cinch to write. Same with The Sword Keeper.

That just about does it for this post. I intended to write another Self-Sufficient Writer post responding to some of the craziness going on in the world right now, but that will have to hold off until next week. I’ve also got another trope post planned for Monday, so that should be interesting.

In the meantime, I’ll leave you with this video about how many twinkies it would take to power the Death Star. Take care!

OMG OMG OMG!!!

I know this is my third post today, but I saw this on Youtube today and I HAD to post it.

I’ve been dying to see The Martian ever since Matt Damon’s awesome performance in Interstellar. Haven’t read the book yet, though it’s definitely on my TBR list—everything I’ve heard about it is really good.

First Gravity, then Interstellar, and now The Martian—I love love love these near-future space movies!

A cast iron birthday!

CAM00207

So my 30th birthday is this month, and my parents gave me what may quite possibly prove to be the best birthday present ever: the family’s old cast iron skillet! These things are AWESOME for cooking–they heat evenly, hold warmth for a long time, have a better non-stick surface than teflon (if you care for it properly), can be used on anything from ovens to electric stove tops to campfire coals, and are virtually indestructible. I can’t wait to start using mine!

CAM00204As you can see from the photo, though, it needs quite a bit of work. There’s a lot of old gunk and rust that needs to be scraped off, and it needs to be tempered and seasoned. Tempering is the process where you heat up the iron to let the oil soak into the pores, so that when it cools down, you have a thin layer of oil bonded to the surface. That’s what gives it the nonstick properties and keeps it from rusting. If you wash a cast iron skillet in soap, it scrubs off that all-important layer of oil, leaving it exposed to water which makes it oxidize and rust. That’s what happened here.

Fortunately, these things are so indestructible that a little bit of rust isn’t going to ruin it. It’ll take some work to get it cleaned up and functional again, but I could use a fun side-project to keep me busy. Besides, I have a writing buddy down the street who can help me out with it. He’s a pretty interesting guy: he has a 3D printer, grows most of the food he eats, worked on film sets for a few years, does some gunsmithing on the side–like I said, he’s an interesting guy. I believe the Grantville Gazette has bought a couple of his stories, though they have yet to come out in print. We’re thinking about collaborating together, or maybe starting a podcast.

In any case, this is going to be an AWESOME project that I’m sure will keep me occupied for the next long while. I can hardly wait to fry some bacon in this thing! Bacon, and baked beans, and cornbread … mmm!

Reasons why September is my favorite month of the year

  • Chilly mornings
  • Campfire smoke
  • Farmer’s markets
  • Crisp Gala apples
  • Home-cooked chili
  • Autumn leaves
  • Labor Day weekend
  • My birthday
  • Start of the school calendar
  • Old friends coming and going
  • Last chance to go mountain climbing
  • First chance to take out winter clothes
  • End of the summer slump
  • Beginning of harvest season
  • Orion and the Pleiades
  • Clear blue skies
  • Indian summers
  • Long, chilly walks by moonlight
  • The peace and quiet between summer vacation and the holidays
  • Getting back into writing after a long and eventful summer

I’ll post another excerpt from Strangers in Flight soon (as well as a cover reveal for the omnibus!), but I woke up this morning feeling like life was awesome, and I had to share why. Of course life is awesome in more months than just September, but it’s my favorite month of the year, as you can definitely see!

Progress is going well on the next Sons of the Starfarers book! I’m on the third chapter, and it’s really picking up. My goal is to finish the first draft before the end of the month, then write book V in October while book IV is with my first readers, so that I can have everything squared away for a release in December or January. But if all goes well, it should be up for pre-order by November.

That’s just about it for now–better get back to writing. Take care, and have an awesome September! 😀

The door hissed open

Heinlein’s doors famously “iris” open, and the doors in my novels “hiss” open. That gives us a pretty good idea what it sounds like, but what does it look like?

This:

That part at the end where he presses the two keys and steps through–that is almost exactly what I imagine it looks like when one of my characters palms an access panel.

Someday when I’m a homeowner, I’m going to install doors like this in every major room in my house. I kid you not. And if I run out of other projects, I’ll build a standing jacuzzi like the shower units in my novels, with nozzles that blast you from all sides and a drier that blows hot air from the top. That is a Youtube video that I would love to see.

Live long and prosper, my friends. May the stars of Earth continually align in your favor.

Thoughts on declining sales and the summer slump

According to conventional bookselling wisdom, summer is the slowest time out of the year for book sales. But is that really the case? I’ve heard David Gaughran and Ed Robertson argue that that’s just a myth perpetuated by New York publishers who are completely out of touch with their readers. Sales don’t fluctuate with the season so much as with promotions and new releases, so the argument goes.

Well, it’s been three years since I started self-publishing, and I still have no idea whether there’s a slump or not. June was my best month ever, but sales have fallen off sharply since then and it looks like August is going to be the worst month of the year. I wish I could blame that on the summer slump, but last year, June was also my best month, and sales after that held more or less steady.

It’s a hard thing to watch your main source of income fall more than 50% over the course of seven or eight weeks. More than anything else, it’s reinforced to me that I cannot afford to rely on just one income stream. Most of my sales come through Amazon, but I need to figure out ways to promote and market my books on the other venues. Relying almost exclusively on Amazon is like putting all your officers in the same shuttlecraft.

How much of the decline has to do with the launch of Kindle Unlimited last month? I don’t know, but it’s making me nervous. None of my books are available through KU because Amazon requires exclusivity in order to be enrolled in the program. That’s not something I’m willing to give them, at least with my already published books. But I may enroll one of my future books in the program, just to see what it’s about.

Honestly, though, I think the slump has more to do with my own lack of promotion and the fact that I haven’t had a new release for two months. When Strangers in Flight (Sons of the Starfarers: Book 3) comes out next month, I hope that will change things around.

I think it’s also good to remember that books don’t spoil. In a certain sense, it doesn’t matter when a book comes out–when a reader discovers a book for the first time, to them, it’s something new. My Star Wanderers series has been out for a while, but there are still a lot of people who have never heard of it and would probably enjoy it. I’ve got to find ways to get at least the first book into those people’s hands.

I really, really suck at marketing though, as you can probably tell from the fact that I’m blogging about writerly business stuff that isn’t all that interesting to the average fan. 😛 Until now, I’ve been relying mainly on the strength of my writing to sell itself, but that probably isn’t the best strategy.

And that’s one of the other problems with the idea of the summer slump–it lulls you into thinking that things will pick up on their own once the summer is over. Well, that’s one rude awakening that I’d rather avoid if I can help it. In this case, the path of least regret is to assume that the slump is a myth and get back to work, dammit. Because even if it isn’t, it’s not like the extra marketing is going to hurt you.

Enough with the boring business stuff. Here’s Grant Thompson doing the ALS ice bucket challenge with dry ice. Enjoy!