So I just got back from Easter vacation in Turkey, at Trabzon and Lake Uzungöl. It was pretty awesome–I’ll definitely be blogging about it in the next couple of days! First, though, I wanted to share something interesting that happened on the way back.
While I was hanging out in Batumi with some other TLG volunteers eating Adjarian khatchapuri (an experience in itself), we got to talking about what we’re going to do with our lives after we get back to the States. Most of them didn’t really want to think about it, which surprised me, so I asked why.
They told me they didn’t want to have to figure out the rest of their lives–that coming out to Georgia to teach English was a way of putting off those major life decisions. Fair enough. They then asked me if I’ve figured it out. I said yes: that I want to be a full-time writer, and that I’m out here to see the world and get some cultural experience as I try to make that dream a reality.
One of the girls then asked what my backup was if that didn’t work out. To be honest, I had no idea what to say. My plan at this point is to just keep teaching and traveling until the dream becomes a reality. Am I confident that it will? Eventually, yeah–as long as I keep writing, which I certainly will.
I thought about it a bit on the way back, and realized that my mindset has shifted tremendously in the past few years. When I was back in college, and to some extent for the first year after I graduated, I used to worry a lot about my “backup plan.” It was a way of addressing the fear of failure, of creating an illusion of safety by having a “fallback.”
I’m sure there are careers where that’s a good idea. Generally, those are careers with definite paths, where if you don’t pass a certain number of checkpoints, you’re basically screwed. With writing, though, there is no set path that everybody follows–especially now with ebooks and epublishing. Because of this, it’s impossible to really fail–either you keep on trying until you make it, or for one reason or another you give up.
Ever since I graduated in 2010, I’ve been structuring my life in such a way that I can continue to pursue my writing. Every job I’ve taken has just been a stepping stone, a bridge to allow me to keep pursuing this dream. Have I made it yet? No, but I haven’t given up yet either, so I haven’t had to fall back on my backup–whatever that would mean at this point.
From the outside, it probably looks like I’m being hopelessly responsible–that, or willfully oblivious to a hundred things I should be worried sick about. However, I’m actually quite confident that I’m on the right path and things will work out–and that surprises me. It’s like that moment when you realize you’re actually swimming, not just kicking and thrashing about the pool.
Worst case scenario, I fall head over heels in love with an awesome, wonderful girl, and after a few heady months filled with blissful romance, I wake up one morning and realize that I’m married. If that happens, I might have to put my writing on hold for a while until I get things sorted out so that I can support both myself and my wife–but then again, with her help, I might be able to do twice as much, or even more. Perhaps that will help my writing career even more than trying to go it alone.
So really, there is no back up plan or worst case scenario–just the future. And as Georgians are so fond of saying, “no one can know what will happen in future.”
მოტაცება (pronounced mot’atseba) is the Georgian word for bride kidnapping, as opposed to regular kidnapping, which takes a different word. It’s an ancient practice in the Caucasus region that doesn’t happen as much as it used to, but still happens, especially in the rural areas. Today, most Georgians condemn it, but there’s still a whole slew of lingering cultural subtexts that can be very difficult for a Westerner (like me) to understand and navigate.
The video clip at the top is from a Georgian comedy program (named, aptly enough, “Comedy შაუ”), and does a pretty good job illustrating how mot’atseba works. Of course, the genders have been reversed–50% of Georgian humor is cross-dressing, and the other 50% is cross-dressing with slapstick–but everything else is pretty accurate. Like I said in a previous post, it’s like a weird game of capture-the-flag involving sex and arranged marriage, where the flag is the girl.
This is how it works: boy meets girl. Boy decides to marry girl. Boy gets his friends together and kidnaps the girl (with or without her consent), holding her captive overnight. The next morning, boy contacts girl’s parents to ask for girl’s hand in marriage.
Since the girl has been held overnight, the implication is that she’s been raped (which may or may not be true). Therefore, to avoid a scandal which could tarnish the family’s reputation, the parents will usually marry their daughter off as quickly as possible. However, if the girl can escape, or the girl’s brothers can rescue her before nightfall, the crisis can be averted.
I first heard about mot’atseba from this post on Georgia On My Mind, back when I was looking into TLG about a year ago. It disturbed me a little, but not enough to dissuade me from coming to Georgia. A couple of weeks ago, however, I learned that that was how my host parents got married.
Here’s the thing, though: they both seem to remember it kind of fondly. In fact, when my host mom saw the clip from Comedy შაუ, she couldn’t stop laughing. Her mom lives with them now, and from time to time they go out to visit his family in the village, so it looks like everyone’s on pretty good terms.
So what the heck happened?
Here’s the story, as best as I can piece it together. They were introduced by his sister, who was her coworker at the hospital. After a month, he got together with some friends and took her without violence to his family’s house out in the village. She was surprised and upset at first, of course, but her parents gave their consent, and so they were married the next day by a magistrate. Now, they’ve got four kids–a huge family, by Georgian standards–and seem to be pretty happy together.
As a Westerner, it blows my mind that a strong, healthy family can come out of something as violent as an act of kidnapping. Indeed, I have yet to be convinced that that’s a normal outcome. However, after asking around and doing some research, I’ve come to realize that mot’atseba isn’t a black and white issue: there are all sorts of cultural subtexts that make the issue much more complicated.
The key to understanding how all this works is the following proverb, which underscores the entire Georgian concept of gender roles and the differences between men and women:
If a woman says no, she means maybe. If she says maybe, she means yes. If she says yes, she is not a woman.
From this, two things follow:
1: Women are fickle, therefore men should be assertive.
As a man, I see this all the time. All three of my co-teachers are women, and all of them constantly defer to me, even though they have far more professional experience than I do. When I had some pretty serious differences over teaching methodologies with one of them, she suggested that I take over the next lesson and teach it without her interference, so that she could get a better idea that way. This isn’t the case with the female volunteers–many of them complain about how hard it is to get anyone to take their suggestions seriously.
2: A woman can never say no.
If “no” is constantly interpreted as “maybe,” then it follows that no one (or at least, no man) is going to believe that a woman is even capable of saying “no.” This turns the whole concept of rape into a nebulous gray area, unlike the United States, where women have a lot more power at least in terms of the law.
This is not to say that in Georgian culture, women are doormats or property (even though that’s what some TLGers claim). Women have a number of support networks, such as family, friends, and other women, and can use these networks to ward off unwanted attention. When I asked my host sister if she’s worried that a mot’atseba would ever happen to her, she said no, because if it did, her three brothers would kick some serious ass.
On top of all this, Georgians have no real concept of casual dating. If a girl and a guy are seeing each other, they’re either married or about to be married. This shows up in the way they use Facebook and other social networks: instead of listing themselves as “in a relationship,” the girl will give her password to the guy she’s dating. And they don’t just do it because the guy demands it–when my host sister was seeing someone, he asked her if she wanted to give her password to him, as if that was the natural next-step in their relationship. From the way she told me, she seemed to be worried that she’d made a mistake by telling him no. Of course, I told her she’d made the right decision!
Combine all of these together, and you should start to get a clearer picture of some of the subtext surrounding mot’atseba.
When I asked my first co-teacher about it, she said it was only an ancient practice and absolutely didn’t happen anymore. When I brought up rape and asked if that was also a part of it, she was horrified and didn’t want to talk about it. However, when I asked if it’s possible for a happy marriage to come of it, she kind of smiled a little and said that if the woman likes it, then why not?
My second co-teacher was much more straight with me. Yes, it happens occasionally, though it was a lot more “fashionable” about twenty or thirty years ago. No, it’s not romantic. Yes, a lot of the marriages aren’t very happy, which is why so many of them end in divorce. She told me that one of her friends from college was married through mot’atseba, and that she knows of at least one case in our school where an 8th grader was kidnapped and married. However, under President Sakashvili, mot’atseba is now a serious crime, so it’s not as common as it used to be.
My third co-teacher’s answer was a lot sketchier. The first time I asked about it was in passing, as she walked in on the conversation I was having with my first co-teacher. When I asked her about rape, she laughed and said “well yes, of course it happens!” as if that wasn’t a big deal. Later, however, she sat me down and said quite seriously that mot’atseba is a horrible thing, that it’s a criminal act, that it doesn’t happen anymore, etc etc.
However–and this was perhaps the most illuminating thing–she said that sometimes, when a guy and a girl are in love, but she’s being wishy-washy and non-committal, he’ll sweep her off her feet and carry her off. In fact, that was what happened with her: her boyfriend wanted to marry her, but she kept putting it off, so one day he tricked her into getting in the car and told her “all right, enough is enough–we’re getting married this weekend.” And they did.
When I asked her if that was mot’atseba, she said no, but I think the subtext was similar. A real man knows how to assert himself and take what he wants. Since a real woman will never say yes, sometimes you just have to man up and tell her how it’s going to be. And don’t worry if she says no at first–she only says that because she doesn’t really know what she wants yet. She’ll come around eventually.
It sounds pretty horrible, but that seems to be how it works. And really, there are gradations of it. Most Georgians will agree that it’s wrong for a guy to kidnap a girl he doesn’t know so that he can rape her and force her to marry him. But if the guy and the girl know each other, and are already pretty serious (ie seeing each other at all), and he wants to speed things up–or, alternately, if she knows her parents would never say yes otherwise–that’s when everyone speaks of it with a wink and a nod.
And really, can we say that our culture’s problems are any less abhorrent? What about teenage pregnancy? Secret abortions? Date rape? At least with mot’atseba, the guy is trying to marry the girl, not just sleep with her and walk away. If it’s just sex that the guy is after, there are a lot more easier ways to get it than risking a prison sentence.
So is it “wrong”? I don’t know if it’s possible to say yes or no, except on a case by case basis. My host sister knows a girl who was kidnapped at age 12 and had a baby the year after. I’m pretty sure that’s wrong. But when I told her what would happen to that guy in the states–that he would go on the registered sex offender list and spend the rest of his life ostracized and unable to find work–she thought that that was wrong too. And as for my host parents, well, it seemed to work out well for them.
I don’t know. But either way, it’s definitely an interesting anthropological experience.
A chaotic good character acts as his conscience directs him with little regard for what others expect of him. He makes his own way, but he’s kind and benevolent. He believes in goodness and right but has little use for laws and regulations. He hates it when people try to intimidate others and tell them what to do. He follows his own moral compass, which, although good, may not agree with that of society.
Interestingly, once the evil bad guys are gone, the balance between Good and Chaotic is even more difficult to keep than the line between Good and Lawful. For that reason, Chaotic Goods often make extremely poor rulers after the war is over. When they win, they usually do one of the following:
Accept the new responsibilities and give up the life of adventure to finally settle down. They shift away from Chaotic Good and become something else.
Of all the character alignments, this one is my favorite. It fits my own sensibilities almost perfectly. Whenever a character of this type has to give up their old life to accept their new responsibilities, I can’t help but feel a little wistful and sad (maybe that’s why I haven’t settled down and married yet…hmm…).
This trope is extremely prevalent in manga and anime, with Edward Elric from Fullmetal Alchemist my personal favorite. Agatha and Gil from Girl Genius are also really awesome–it’s going to be interesting to see how Gil shifts now that his father is out of the picture. In science fiction, Captain Kirk is probably the most beloved character of this type, though almost all of Heinlein’s protagonists also fit the bill.
In my own work, Tiera Al-Najmi from Desert Stars is probably the best example of this trope. She stands alone against the restrictive norms and hypocrisy of her society, urging Mira to do what’s right instead of what’s expected. In Bringing Stella Home, James McCoy fits this trope too, though you could also make an argument that he’s more of a Neutral Good. In Heart of the Nebula, however, he’s definitely Chaotic Good, which puts him squarely at odds with Lars, a Lawful Good who appears in all of the Gaia Nova novels thus far.
So! My Christmas vacation in Texas is over, and I’m on the road again, hanging out here in Utah before catching the train to my parents’ house in Massachusetts and (hopefully) going overseas before the end of the month.
It was a great break! Great to see my niece and three nephews together. I swear, my sisters have the cutest kids; it’s going to be a real challenge to find a woman beautiful enough so that my kids will be able to compete! For Christmas, I gave them all trilobites from my fossil collection.
My favorite moment was probably playing with them at the community park, on the slides and other stuff. Jane, who is two and a half, likes to wear pretty dresses and run around the playground talking to herself, which is really cute. Dan, who just started to walk, would climb up to the slides and then stop at the top because he’s too scared to go down. It was fun watching him discover and explore his world.
On the way back to Utah, we stopped by my old roommate Steve’s place up in Dallas. He lives in an apartment that is just like a freaking motel…how crazy is that? Pretty cool, actually. It was fun to see him again, especially since he’s getting married in April. Good times.
My sister gave me the gift of her stomach flu, though, which really hit the next day. Around Amarillo, it got so bad that we pulled over on the shoulder and I fell out of the car vomiting. It was…like something from one of my novels, actually. We were hoping to make it all the way to Farmington and the Navajo reservation, but ended up in a Hotel 8 outside of Clines Corner for a very miserable night.
The next day was much better, though, and we made good time all the way back to Provo. My brother in law couldn’t stop talking about the book I’d gotten him, Born to Run, and said that it’s changed his life (he’s a runner…go figure). We also talked about story structure, Girl Genius, places we’d like to settle down, life plans, etc. Stopped in Moab for some dinner, and in Bluff to check out this really cool looking historical site. We switched over in Blanding, and before we knew it, I was pulling us into Provo after driving almost five hours straight.
As a side note, I want to say that I love Southern Utah. ZOMG, it has some of the most beautiful desolate country I have ever seen. Inasmuch as I can see myself settling down anywhere, I’d really like to settle down in a place like Monticello or Blanding or Saint George.
Texas is also beautiful, but I’d probably find the rampant consumerism a bit too stifling, and New England winters are far too dark and depressing (unless you have a cozy little cottage with a wood-burning stove). But Utah–this is my people, living in my kind of country: wild, open, and desolate, where the pioneers are remembered by name and ancient Indian ghosts still haunt the land.
So anyway, I’m back in Provo for a day before heading out on a train late tonight to Massachusetts. If you’re in the area and want to hang out, give me a call. This is my last day in Utah for at least the next couple of years or so, and I want to make it count!
My internet access in the next couple of days is going to be spotty, but I want to do a couple more posts to round out the year. A lot of things changed for me in 2011, so I want to recap that, and I’ve been thinking a lot about my New Year’s resolutions, so I’ll definitely do a post on that as well. I’ll probably write those on the train, though, so they might not go up until next week.
That’s the plan, anyway. I hope you all had a wonderful Christmas, and I look forward to hearing from you again soon!
Whew! I just finished revising through almost 9k words in Desert Stars. I’ve only got three more chapters and an epilogue to go, and man, I am so excited about this story! I have no doubt it’s my best work yet.
Of course, I might be biased. 😉
Star Wanderers is also coming along very well. I’ve only got a few more scenes to write/revise before it’s ready to send off to the next round of first readers. Part of me wants to send it off to Writers of the Future right now (and according to Dean’s sage advice, that’s probably what I should do), but I want to get some feedback first just to make sure there isn’t something I’ve missed that would make it better. If all goes well, I’ll probably send it off by the end of the month.
This is the best part of writing process: finishing up a project that you know is good. This is one reason why I love rewriting so much. If I could do this all day, every day, and get paid enough for my work to make ends meet, I’d be living the dream.
Until then, however, I’ve got to figure out another way to make ends meet. One option I’m considering very seriously is selling my contract and driving across the country this Thanksgiving to spend a month or two with my parents before going overseas. My mom was the one who suggested it, and I have to admit it makes a lot of sense; if I’m going to go abroad to teach English anyways, why not spend some time back home?
If this is something I need to do, I’m going to have to make the decision very soon, possibly before the end of next week–and if you know me, you know that I’m terrible at making decisions. However, I have been thinking about it enough to make a couple of lists, and this is what I’ve come up with so far:
Reasons to go to abroad:
To start a new career.
To have adventures.
To experience another culture.
To gain TEFL experience.
To support myself as I write.
To have a change.
To see the world.
To have something to write about.
Reasons to stay in Utah:
To get married.
To focus on writing.
To pursue a graduate degree.
To stay in a predominantly Mormon community.
I decided to list only the positive reasons for making either decision, and not to consider any of the creeping doubts or fears (and there are many!). So let’s break it down:
To start a new career: This seems prudent, especially if it takes a while for my books to really take off. Specifically, a TEFL career seems like something I could juggle with my writing career, and it would certainly offer a lot more satisfaction than a grunt day job.
To have adventures: Perhaps not the most responsible reason, but hey, you’ve got to remember to have fun.
To experience another culture: One of the perks of traveling, for sure. It would probably improve my writing considerably as well, though culture shock and distance from family would certainly pose a challenge.
To gain TEFL experience: In other words, to find out if teaching English as a foreign language is something I want to build a career around, or whether I’m just not suited for it. This is why I’d want to do the TLG program first, before heading off somewhere like Cairo or Amman. And if it doesn’t work out…well, at least I’d know. Right now, I don’t.
To support myself as I write: This is huge. I hear that most TEFL jobs only take up about 20 hours per week, and that if you’re living in a local apartment, it’s not hard to make time to write. In the past two years, I haven’t had any success balancing writing with full-time work, and working part time probably wouldn’t earn me enough to support myself here in the states.
To have a change: Not quite as tangible a reason, but important nonetheless. I can’t quite explain it, but if I stay where I am now, in my current life situation…it’s just not going to work out.
To see the world: I could probably lump this under “to have adventures.”
To have something to write about: Also huge. My experiences in Jordan and the Middle East were a huge inspiration for Desert Stars, and if I’d never gone over there, the novel wouldn’t be nearly as rich. Who knows what else my imagination would produce if I spent some time traveling the world?
Now, for the other side:
To get married: Honestly, this is more of a negative reason than a positive reason. I’ve already decided that I’m only going to marry someone who’s a practicing Mormon, and since Utah is predominantly Mormon, I’m worried that if I leave Utah, I won’t be able to find someone.
Trouble is…I’ve been here for almost six years, and still haven’t found anyone. I could probably put more effort into dating, but the truth is probably that finding a marriage partner is more about your mindset than where you physically live.
Besides, I could always spend a year or two abroad and come back. I’d be pushing thirty and well beyond “menace to society” status, but at least I wouldn’t be a loser who spent all his twenties in Utah.
To focus on writing: This was why I decided last year not to go teach English in Korea. The ebook revolution was just getting started, and I felt that I needed to stay in the states to learn how the market was changing and focus on building my indie writing career.
Now, however, I feel like I’m high enough on the learning curve that I can afford to work on other things. Besides, with the current state of the economy, I don’t think I’m going to find balance if I stay in the states.
To pursue a graduate degree: I’ve largely ruled this one out. I don’t see how an English degree would help me at this point, and I don’t currently have any career aspirations that would justify pursuing an advanced degree. The only reason I’d go back to school is to postpone facing the real world, and that’s probably the worst reason I could possibly have.
To stay in a predominantly Mormon community: Kind of the opposite of “see the world” and “experience another culture,” and it gets at the very heart of the matter. Would it be better to establish myself among people who are more like me and share my values, or should I venture out of the “bubble” and see what else is out there? I have a much stronger support group here in Utah than I’d probably have as a global nomad, but do I really need it? Am I independent enough to strike out and bloom wherever I’m planted?
I don’t know. My thinking is so muddled with doubts and second thoughts that this whole exercise has probably been futile. If I had to make a decision RIGHT THIS SECOND, however, I’d probably choose to go.
If nothing else, it would give me a good two months of writing time. 🙂
So my cousin Angela tagged me in this cross-linking truth-or-dare blog game, and it looks fun so I figured I’d participate. Here goes:
Do you think you’re hot?
I suffer from no illusions as to my ability (or rather, lack thereof) to carnally attract the opposite sex. That’s not to say I’m ugly, but when you apply the Pareto principle to dating (and let’s be honest, it’s really more of a 90/10 split), I don’t make the cut.
And you know what? I’m fine with that. Because it only takes one…
What is your current desktop wallpaper?
This glorious image from APOD (Astronomy Picture of the Day). It’s enough to make me want to move to Iceland, and that’s saying something.
When was the last time you ate chicken?
I made some awesome fajitas last week, and the chicken was on sale at Maceys. I always cook my own chicken; I hate the precooked frozen stuff.
What were you thinking as you were doing this?
Who comes up with these things anyway? Hmm, I wonder if I could start one…
Do you have nicknames?
I have two internet screen names, which are probably the only nicknames of mine that are still in use (besides the ones people use behind my back). The first is “onelowerlight,” and it’s all over the place. The second I use only on deviant art and a certain fan-fiction site, and it is and shall remain a closely guarded secret.
My old writing friend Laura, who just got back from an LDS mission in Armenia. Has a lot of interesting and insightful things to say, such as her last post on the difference between strong female characters who are independent vs. strong female characters who are interdependent.
Say something about number five.
Sarah is one of my little sisters, and she just had a baby! Also, she worked for a couple years in a survivalist-oriented wilderness therapy program, and knows how to make traps, kill and eat animals, and make fire with sticks and a bow. Oh, and she’s also hilarious. If I’m ever stranded on a desert island, she’s my first pick for who I’d want with me.
How did you get to know number three?
Chuck? I think she showed up at a writing group meeting when I was VP of Quark. She was never really active in the club, but we also took Sanderson’s 318 class a couple times and went to CONduit in 2008 together. Meh; she’s alright, I guess (jk!).
How about number four?
(who comes up with these questions?)
Mykle is my geekiest brother in law, at least in terms of books and sf&f fandom (linux, that would be Danny). He married Sarah two months after meeting her and I think it was the best decision either of them ever made. He doesn’t blog much, but when he does, it’s always thoughtful and interesting.
Leave a message for number six
Thanks Kindal for the feedback on Worlds Away! Blunt as always but quite helpful.
Leave a lovey-dovey message for number two
For my sister?? Ewwwww…
Seriously Kate, I love your blog. And you have the freaking cutest daughter on the face of the planet. Thanks for making me an uncle!
Do number seven and number eight have any similarities?
Yes, in fact. Aneeka (no. 7) spent a couple years teaching English in Japan; Anthon (no. 8 ) hasn’t spent more than a week or two in the same place (or more than a month or two on the same continent) for the last two years. Let me just say, I am in awe of these world travelers and hope to do likewise at some point in the future.
So in case you didn’t know, General Conference was this past weekend. General Conference is this huge semi- annual conference broadcast live from Salt Lake City, where the leaders of the Church of Jesus Christ talk on a number of topics and issues relevant to the church. This year, one of the main recurring themes was the need for young singles, especially men, to get married and settle down.
In a church where the holiest sacrament is temple marriage, where husband, wife, and children are considered sealed to each other “for time and all eternity,” this emphasis on marriage shouldn’t come as a huge surprise. To be honest, I was more amused than anything; just a couple days before, I’d posted a comment on my sister’s blog mentioning how apathetic I am right now about dating and getting married. Youch.
So anyhow, with my whole family nagging me about this–all of whom are married or engaged, by the way–I suppose I ought to give my thoughts on the subject.
This week’s Writing Excuses podcast was on writing romance, and while I found it extremely helpful in my own writing, I also found the points interesting as a young single adult. According to Sarah Eden, a regency romance writer who was a guest in this episode, in order for a romance in a book to work, the characters must:
1) fulfill a need in each other, 2) create a relationship that has emotional resonance, and 3) be something for each other that no-one else can be.
Probably the biggest reason I’m not married right now (foregoing the whole “haven’t met the right person yet” question, which is valid) is because I just don’t feel like I have a need that isn’t being fulfilled. That probably means I’m in a comfort zone, which is a bad thing, but that’s the truth.
It’s not that I’m not attracted to a fair number of women, because I definitely am. It’s just that for most of the women in my life right now, when I ask myself “do I have a real, hungering need for her companionship?” the answer is “no.”
There have been a couple of times in my life where that wasn’t the case–where I felt infatuated with a girl and really, honestly felt that she was or could be something that no one else could be. Long story short, for various reasons (some of which I still don’t understand), it never worked out. Sometimes it was me, sometimes it was her, and now most of my old crushes are happily married…to other people.
And as for why I’m not looking more actively, I could go on a(nother) long rant about why the Utah dating scene really, really sucks for a person like me (doesn’t fit the cookie cutter mold, doesn’t have a secure financial future, isn’t ridiculously attractive, etc etc), but all that is beside the point.
I’ve never really seen the point in dating as a way to get to know people, since first dates are generally awkward and fake, but I’m also really bad at transitioning from friendship to something more than that. So in other words, the advice “go on more dates” helps me about as much as telling someone with clinical depression that they should just “be happy.”
Not that I’m depressed because I’m single. I’m actually okay with it. The thing I’m wondering, though, is whether that’s a good thing or a bad thing?
I should probably force myself to go out more often, or to at least try to connect with more eligible young women and make them a part of my life somehow. And maybe another problem is that I’ve never really seen myself as a married person–though I doubt it, because most of my married friends have jumped into it without really knowing what life is like on the other side.
But the point is, I need to take some time and figure out how to make getting married a priority. And really, that’s the only thing I can say for sure.
My second indie published short story, “Decision LZ1527,” is now available for $.99 from Amazon. This is the same story that was published in the December 2009 issue of Leading Edge. I’ve also included a short author’s note at the end, explaining the writing process from idea to publication.
As with “Memoirs of a Snowflake,” the epublishing process wasn’t that complicated. The story was short enough that I didn’t feel a need for a table of contents, and Amazon reformatted the uploaded .doc file without any problems.
The biggest difference with this one was that I contacted the artist from the December issue and bought the rights to use the art. It cost a bit, but not much more than what Leading Edge paid for the story, so overall I haven’t taken much of a loss.
I wrote “Decision LZ1527” back in 2006, when I was a sophomore in college trying to navigate the bizarre dating world of BYU. It’s about a boy trying to find the courage to ask out his secret crush, as told from the point of view of the little men inside his head, piloting him like some kind of spaceship.
So yeah, I hope you check it out and enjoy it! If you don’t have a Kindle, Amazon has a number of free apps that will allow you to read it on just about any platform (including your computer). And if you haven’t already picked up “Memoirs of a Snowflake,” you can get it for $.99 too.
I’ll do an update in a week or two about my indie publishing venture, but so far it’s been pretty fun! Hopefully, by putting out these stories, I’ll be able to share them with more people than would have read them otherwise. So thanks, and I hope you enjoy!
Just a quick post before I go to bed…and I really should, because it’s freaking late.
I feel like I’ve been getting more and more busy, yet less and less productive. It’s @%$! frustrating. In the last two weeks, I’ve had numerous job applications and interviews (though not as many interviews as I’d like), tons of complicated paperwork for the EPIK job in Korea I’m hoping to take come September, the only TEFL course I’m taking (in which I feel I am constantly behind), and all sorts of other random crap.
Oh, and then there’s writing. I’ve been averaging only about 1.5k words per day, which is kind of pathetic when you realize that I don’t have regular work.
I wish I could say that I’ve been spending a lot of this extra time socializing, but sadly that isn’t the case. I haven’t gone out on a date in months, and with each passing week I drift further and further from the people in my ward. I’ve been pretty active with Quark, though, so that sort of makes up for things, but not enough.
One of the good things, though, is that I’ve been getting up relatively early all week–and by “relatively,” I mean before 9:00 am. Next week’s goal: go to bed by 1:00, and get up before 8:00. The timestamp on this post can probably tell you how much of a head start I’ve got.
Oh, and I have been exercising regularly. That’s a good thing, I suppose. Haven’t seen many results of that, except perhaps a slightly more active lifestyle, but it’s fun and I’ll keep it up. Running is where I catch up on old podcasts, and I subscribe to quite a few.
I don’t know if this late night rant is useful in any way, except maybe to empathize with what it’s like when you’re busy all the time but never feel like you’re getting enough done. I guess most people feel like that at one point or another, but it’s good to look back and see what you accomplished, like I did here. For all the spinning out, I suppose it wasn’t a total wash. And really, it almost never is.
But yeah, the main thing that makes me angsty is that I never feel that I’m writing enough. I hear from everyone that with the way the publishing world is changing, fast writers have a huge advantage over slow ones. And I know I have the ability to write fast, it’s just that I never really do it consistently.
Fast, in my mind, is 4k words or more per day. I can hit it when I’m on, but that’s fairly rare. Most of the time, I average between 2k and 2.5k, and my personal deadlines reflect that.
At least with ITND, however, I’ve been writing consistently every day…except today, when I took time off to revamp a short story (“From the Ice Incarnate”). But my wordcount graph hasn’t had any huge spikes or valleys, which is good I suppose. The novel is coming along, if slowly, and that’s a good sign.
The two main characters in WAFH just had a DTR (Define The Relationship discussion) and it was, well, kind of rough. I don’t know what’s harder: having one in real life, or writing a fictional one that actually works.
I also don’t know which one I have more personal experience with, but that’s a subject I’d rather not get into right now.
Anyhow, even though that was an unexpected rough spot that had me down for the past few days, the end for WAFH 2.0 is definitely in sight. I’ve got one more scene in this chapter, the big climactic end battle / rescue / whatever, and then a very short epilogue. In all, that’s about seven scenes, two of which are already written and two others which I can probably glean from recycled material.
In unexpected news, I had a very interesting idea. You know the Writers of the Future contest? I always want to submit to them, but never can, because none of my stuff is short enough. It’s acceptable to submit the first part of a novel–Dave Wolverton did that, with On My Way to Paradise–but only if the first part is a complete story in itself.
Well, as I was walking down the street, I wondered whether I could take one of my novels (like BSH) and eliminate all but one of the viewpoint characters’ scenes. Specifically, I was thinking of doing that with Stella, who goes from prisoner to concubine to queen of a tribe of starfaring warrior nomads. After cutting out all the other storylines and adding in a bit here or there to preserve continuity, it could make for an interesting novella.
Still, it’s going to be tough to get it down to the 17k word contest limit. Stella is one of four major viewpoint characters, so her scenes probably take up at least 25k words in the book. I might be able to cut out a couple of subplots, like the one with Gazan…but I dunno. I’m open to suggestions from those of you who’ve read it.
In other news, I made the first cut for the 2011 Amazon Breakthrough Novel Award contest! I submitted Genesis Earth in the YA category, and mine is one of 1,000 entrants that will go on to the next round of judging. First place wins a $10k publishing contract with Penguin–yay!
I’m trying not to get my hopes up too much, but I’ll know whether I made the second cut by March 22nd. A couple of friends from Quark also made it through the first round, so if any of us makes it to the second, that would be awesome. Go Quarkies!
That’s about it for now; Brandon Sanderson did an interesting lecture in his 318 class on the new world of publishing, which was quite interesting. I’ve got a LOT of new thoughts to share on indie publishing, but that will have to wait for another post.
Until then, keep being awesome…but not like this guy:
