Tag: just for fun

Take me to Arabia

Recently, I’ve found myself nearly overwhelmed by the sudden urge to run away to the Middle East and go totally and irrevocably native.  It may pass, but I still want to go back there–really bad.

So I looked up BYU’s TESOL certification program, and figured I could apply in January, start fall of ’11, and be on my way to an Arabian adventure in ’12.

Or…I could bypass the whole certification thing altogether, but I’d probably get a crappier job.  Besides, the certification could lead to other things, like perhaps an actual stable day job.  Who knows?

Regardless, I should probably find some way to actually use my Arabic degree.  After all, why did I get it in the first place?  Better put it to use!

So why am I tripping out on Middle East stuff?  Interestingly enough, I think it has a lot to do with the current novel I’m writing, Worlds Away from Home. I started it in fall ’08, just after getting back from BYU’s 2008 Jordan study abroad program, and the influence is definitely very visible.

Sometimes it makes me cringe a little, though; the fictional culture is patterned after my understanding of and experiences with Arab culture, but…it’s very pseudo Arab, if that make sense.  Kind of like it looks Arab, but it feels more Western.  I don’t know–I guess what I’m saying is that it’s bad (or maybe I just think that because I’m in the middle of the rough draft, when everything I write is utter and absolute crap.  Blegh).

But the thing is, if I try to make the culture truly foreign, I’m worried it will be more of a barrier to the reader than a gateway.  In other words, it’s the classic science fiction problem of aliens: the more you succeed in making your aliens truly alien, the harder it is for the reader to understand or sympathize with them.

But then again, isn’t that why we read?  To be transported to different times and places, experience other people and cultures, and be exposed to new ideas?  To expand our minds and enrich our understanding?  If that’s the case, there’s got to be something good and healthy about immersing the reader in a totally foreign culture.

Unfortunately, that doesn’t make it any easier.

Oh well.  I’m up for the challenge.  In the meantime, I’ll keep reading T. E. Lawrence’s The Seven Pillars of Wisdom and continuously loop all my Arab pop.  Not familiar with Arabic music?  Here’s a really good one:

Track 5

(ps: I’d tell you who wrote/performs the song, but frankly I have no idea.  Unfortunately, copyright doesn’t really exist in the Middle East.  Oh well.  Enjoy!)

Cover Letter Fail

On Tuesdays and Thursdays, I volunteer as a slushpile reader for The Leading Edge.  We see some pretty bad stuff, such as stories written entirely in one-line paragraphs, or self-proclaimed “short stories” over 80 pages and 30 chapters long, or hilariously awkward phrases like “the copious softness of her breasts.”

This, however, takes the cake.

It’s a cover letter from an author who submitted a story to us a few months ago that we rejected.  Can you tell?  In one and a half pages, I think he does just about everything that you’re not supposed to do. In fact, it was so bad that Chris, the head editor, wrote a special comment sheet critiquing just the cover letter.

Anyways, here’s it is (with names changed and/or completely removed):

Thanks for your very interesting critiques of “Shamelessly Amateur Story.”

It was perhaps too mysterious and weird. Since much of it went past your knowledgeable readers, I have to think it was too subtile. Or just not clear, something like that.

I, myself, may be a bit mysterious and weird.

This is a much clearer sort of story. It’s about an engineer on a starship, and it draws very strongly on my own experience. No, not on a starship. Smile.

I also do some scifi humor, which the best stories I could use as examples are under submission to others. Since statistics say they will puke on them, if you like scifi humor, you might tell me. (In the computer programmer’s world, to puke on something is only to say that you do not understand it. It does not mean someone is throwing up. I say, “I do not know what you want with ‘w/carrot/show’ ” and that does not mean anything is wrong with what you said, just that my program could not process it.

I do not think I can write a simple story. My work is full of twists and turns and implications. What I need to learn, I believe, is not how to write more simply, but how to write so that the simplest level of interpretation is accessible. I have a story in Rosebud this winter, and I don’t know how the editor looked at it, but I imagine he (Rodrick Clark) is smarter than the next Bear.

Why do I have to make it so complicated? I could write a blood and thunder story, and anyone could see it was pretty good. Well, that would make it easy if it was just about writing what you know. I have seen blood. But I do not want to write about negatives. I want to write stories about how good people are not about how bad they could be. Let me see if I can get to you with ‘Yet Another Shamelessly Amateur Story’ and maybe you can tell me something about positive writing froom this. Oh, and sure, I need to see a sample copy, so here is the $6 for that.

If your guidelines say anything unique, I would like to have them, and will refer to them. I do not think of anyone’s guidelines as really mandatory, but as ‘have an effin’ good reason’ to not follow. You might tell me not to touch you, but if a train is about to run you over. I will grab you and thrrow you off the tracks like a sack of sand. If I have a storyteller’s reason to blow off your guidelines, I will do that, too, but I will have to understand that I need to listen closely to the rules. It’s a little bit like grammar. But bad grammar is more easily forgiven.

Well, anyway. I would like you to look at this story, ‘Yet Another Shamelessly Amateur Story’ and I would like a review, or better, I would like you to buy it. 😉

In any event, I want a sample copy, and here is the $6 for it.

Needless to say, “Yet Another Shamelessly Amateur Story” was rejected. Grammar this bad is NOT more easily forgiven, and though “Yet Another” may have been too subtile for us, we resent it when people treat us like bags of sand.

Beginnings and title woes

Today, I came off my writing break and started my next novel.  The makings of the first scene have been kicking around in my head for the past couple of days, but today I actually sat down and started it.  I’m not sure how strong of a beginning it is, but at least it’s a start.

I would have started yesterday, but I had a horrible time trying to format the file.  No matter how many times and ways I tried to fix the pagination in openoffice, whenever I reopened the file, it came out wrong.  Finally, I switched the file from .doc to .odt, and that did the trick.

Turns out, that may be for the best.  Because of the proliferation of Microsoft Word, everyone seems to use .doc or .docx, but there are several good reasons why ODF (Open Document Format) is better.  In fact, several international governments have made it a matter of public policy to make the switch.  After all the headaches .doc files have given me in openoffice, I certainly have.  We’ll see how that goes.

As for the novel, it really, really needs a new title.  The old one, Hero in Exile, just doesn’t work for me.  It’s too…cliche, in a generic, meaningless way.  Blegh.

And thus begins another search for a good title.  Do you have any ideas?  The story is about a boy raised by desert nomads in search of his true origins, whose world completely falls apart when he falls in love with a girl who wants him to stay.  I suppose it’s kind of a cross between The Jungle Book and Great Expectations…in spaaace!

Mainly, though, it’s about an upright, noble-hearted boy trying to come to terms with the moral corruption and decay of the world around him.  When he finds that corruption inside himself, it almost destroys him, but before the end…no, better not give it away.

I don’t know–I just know it needs a better title.  Any ideas?

Oh, and before I go to bed, you might find this interesting.  It’s an original arrangement of one of the most memorable songs from the Xenogears soundtrack.  It even has lyrics, written in the language of one of the races of the game.

Wow–talk about a super fan!  I wonder if any of my stories will ever inspire something as amazingly creative as this?  If so, it would be pretty cool–pretty dang cool.

Anyways, night.

New computer!

So about a year ago, I blogged about my dream computer, with dual monitors, a nice comfy chair, and…well, that was it.  What can I say?  I’m easy to please.

Well, now that I’m graduated from BYU and (theoretically) no longer have access to BYU’s computers, I decided to go ahead and build my dream machine.

I got a lot of help picking out parts from my friend Cognoscente, who is a pirate par excellence.  My goal was to be as economical as possible while still picking out parts that are going to last for a long time.  I bought virtually everything from newegg.com, except for the mouse and keyboard which I picked up for $5 each from the BYU surplus sale (I’ll probably pick up a second monitor from them, eventually).

Anyway, here are the specs:

CPU—Intel i3-530 (2.93 GHz, 4 MB cache) ($114.99)
Mobo—Gigabyte GA-P55-USB3 (USB 3.0) ($119.99)
HDD—Western Digital 1TB drive ($69.99)
RAM—A-DATA DDR3 2 x 2GB ($98.99)
Video Card—Zotac 9800 GT 512 MB x2 DVI ($89.99)
PSU—Corsair CMPSU-450VX 450 W ($69.99)
Optical Drive—ASUS 2 MB cache DVD burner ($21.99)
Case—Rosewill Blackbone ($39.99)
Monitor—ASUS 22″ widescreen 1680 x 1050 ($169.99)
Total Price (including s&h, not including rebates): $824.05

I ordered the parts on Memorial day, and guess what? Everything but the video card showed up this morning–and the video card is scheduled to come tomorrow!

So this weekend, after I find a desk somewhere (either from DI or listed free on craigslist), I’m going to get together with Cognoscente and put together this beast.

So yeah, I’m totally geeking out about this new computer. It’s going to be sweeeet once it’s set up–I can hardly wait!

I’m also hoping it will help me write more. Right now, my only machine is my netbook, which is extremely portable and useful for travel, but not very good as a primary machine. It can get tiresome to write on a 10″ screen all day.

So yeah, I totally know what I’m doing this weekend. It’s going to be AWESOME 🙂

So much happening, so little getting done

…in terms of writing, that is.  I got a lot  of little and not-so-little things done today, but didn’t spend much time writing.  Only got about 855 words, when I need to be averaging 2.5k per day in order to finish Mercenary Savior before CONduit.

The weirdest part is that I have so much free time.  No school, no work–no pressing obligations or deadlines.  You’d think I’d be writing 4k a day, just like last summer.

Instead, I’ve been so consumed with getting an apartment, getting a job, getting basic transportation–basically, figuring out a plan for my immediate future–that I’ve lost any momentum I might have had a week ago.  Writing isn’t just about time; it’s about mental space as well.

It’s frustrating.  I feel so distant from Mercenary Savior that it’s hard not to procrastinate, especially now that I’m stuck on one of James’s scenes that needs a complete overhaul.  I wonder whether these revisions are making the novel any better–I need to deal with this outside stress and get back into the story.

Fortunately, things are working out that I’ll probably be able to do that.  I found a cheap bike on craigslist that will hopefully solve my immediate transportation needs, and I’ve got a semi-workable plan as far as employment goes.

The plan that currently seems most attractive is to get a full or 3/4ths part time job at BYU (those come with benefits) before the end of the summer.  Yes, there is still a hiring freeze, but it could lift very soon, and when it does, there will be tons of positions to fill.  It’s not like I’m going to hold out for that, but I’m certainly hopeful.  I felt very good about it when I visited D-70 ASB for information.

Anyways, the key with the writing is to cut the distractions and just slug through it for a few days, until the momentum comes back.  In the absence of school or work, it will be difficult to impose structure on my days, but that problem will solve itself if I can balance job-seeking with writing.

Exactly one month ago, I started the revision for Mercenary Savior.  I’ve got 40 days before the self-imposed deadline, and I’m only 25% finished.  Fortunately, without any school obligations to occupy my time, I should be able to do it.  2.5k per day, that’s the goal.  Once I’ve got some momentum going again, it should be pretty straightforward.

In the meantime, check out this awesome, awesome song from This American Life and rage against the robber barons of the Great Recession:

Bet Against The American Dream from Planet Money on Vimeo.

Newsvomit

Alright, before I collapse from exhaustion and call it a night, here’s what’s up.

Today, I wrote more than 3k words in the revision of Bringing Stella Home (I’m going to change that title soon–I’ve got a new working title, but I don’t know what I think about it).  The whole time, though, it felt as if I was pulling teeth.  I was constantly distracted with one thing or another, and didn’t feel productive at all.  Blegh.

Tomorrow, all that momentum I built up today will probably start to kick in. Unfortunately, I’ve got so much other crap to do instead.  I’m flying out to Utah early Wednesday morning, so I’ve got to pack, do laundry, get a father’s blessing, finish as much schoolwork from Washington Seminar as possible (aka finish the portfolio)…the list keeps going.  It’s going to be a hectic day.

Anyways.  In unrelated news, Duke beat Butler by a measly two points.  The game was so epic even my parents watched it.  Somewhere in an alternate universe, Butler made the half-point shot as the clock ran out.  I’m thinking life must be a lot more exciting in that alternate universe.

In news unrelated to the unrelated news, I found something awesome on the internets last night: the end theme from Jurassic Park for the game gear!!  

Ah, the memories. The beautiful, 16-bit memories.

In other, somewhat related news (related to the writing, that is), I have a new working title for my novel: Mercenary Savior. What do you think? I kind of like it, but it feels like something is missing–something like Mercenary Savior to a ______, or Mercenary Savior in a _____ universe. I dunno.

My dear, trusted alpha readers, what do you think?

It’s full of stars!

I have a confession to make…

I should have been writing these past three hours.  I really should have been writing.  But a couple of days ago, I downloaded this awesome program called Celestia.  And when I say awesome, I mean awesome!

Imagine Google Earth.  Now, imagine Google Earth…for the Universe.

I told you it was awesome.

Anyway, I just downloaded all the messier objects , gps satellites, and some other random addons, and spent the last two hours playing with them when I should have been writing. Gah!

Oh well, I guess you can call it research. 🙂

My goodness–words cannot describe how cool this stuff is.  It’s like…like a planetarium on my computer.  I’ve never felt so small in such an incredibly vast universe!  And oh my heck, do you know what it’s like outside of our galaxy?  No stars–just blackness everywhere!  It’s so freaking scary!  And inside of those massive globular clusters, like M13–holy cow!  What would it be like to live on a planet in one of those clusters??

I should probably stop rambling.  But…but…it’s just so awesome!

This is the kind of stuff I’ve been writing all my life!  Stars and galaxies and planets, other worlds–and now, at last, I can get some kind of a tiny picture of what it all looks like.  I feel like the nexus 6 soldier from Blade Runner: “I’ve seen things…” Seriously, this has the potential to revolutionize my writing.  The things I’ve seen…

But anyway, time to get my mind off the stars (at least temporarily) and write!

FF6 Werewolf Tribute: fifth day

[NOTE: this is part twelve in a series of posts lifted from the quark message boards where I recently GM’d a game of Werewolf.  The theme was Final Fantasy 6, one of my favorite RPGs.  To see the other posts in the series, click here.

WARNING: there will be spoilers here, and lots of them, so if you haven’t played Final Fantasy 6, do yourself a favor and play the game before reading on!]

Shafts of light from deep within Kefka’s tower break through as the walls and floors begin to break apart. With Kefka dead, all magic passes from the world in a great and tremendous storm. The magicite shards of the Espers disintigrate into thin air. Kefka’s tower, held aloft only by magic, begins to collapse.

Cyan makes a mad dash for the Falcon, but when he gets there, he realizes that without Setzer to pilot it, he’s lost. The upper floor of the tower collapses into ruin, and Cyan falls with the Falcon to his death.

At least he dies knowing that he helped save the world from annihilation.

The “innocents” lynch Drakon, the last surviving innocent!

Meanwhile, elsewhere on the tower…

SHADOW (to INTERCEPTOR): Go on, Interceptor. Take care of yourself, boy…

SHADOW (to self): Relm, Strago…….it looks like I can finally stop running…

With everything collapsing all around him, Shadow leaps from the highest parapet of the collapsing tower, falling to the earth, to his death…

But as he falls, a familiar presence envelops him…the presence of a young girl, barely ten, and an older girl, not entirely human…

With the last of her ebbing magic, the ghost of Terra wraps her glowing arms around Shadow’s body and lowers him gently to the ground. The ghost of Relm, who has followed Shadow through the power of the Momento Ring which he wears, summoned the Esper girl’s spirit to his rescue. With the last of her strength, she saves him and gives him a chance at a new life.

With Kefka’s evil, draining presence gone from the world, the clouds begin to break up, allowing the sun to shine through once more. Life and color returns to the ruined world, and with it, hope…for life, love, hope, and the promise of rebirth.

Before Relm’s spirit departs to the Phantom train with the others, her presence lifts the darkness from Shadow’s troubled heart. He takes off his mask and resolves to return from his self-imposed exile from the world and leave his dark past behind…forever.

Victory for the Assassin!

PLAYER ROLES:

Avulsion: MAFIA
Baggins: NECROMANCER (Bannon)
Barigirl: INNOCENT (Edgar)
Caysyka: INNOCENT (Sabin)
CptSqweky: INNOCENT (Gau)
Drakon: INNOCENT (Cyan)
Drek: DETECTIVE (Terra)
Fredward: INNOCENT (Celes)
Jerle: MAFIA
Locke: INNOCENT (Locke)
Lunesar: MAFIA RECRUIT (Setzer)
Onlera: ASSASSIN (Shadow)
PharaohsQueen: INNOCENT (Relm) DL ASSASSIN
sunstarr12: MAFIA
ZeroMoon17: INNOCENT (Strago)