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Trope Tuesday: Sinister Surveillance

secure — This was actually a real poster.

Someone is watching you. Their eyes are everywhere. Everything you do, everything you say … it’s all being recorded in a giant database. But don’t worry–you can trust the ones watching you. They have your best interests at heart. They’re only after the bad guys. You won’t even know that they’re there.

Sinister Surveillance is a hallmark of Dystopia, as essential to the genre as the Crapsack World and the Police Brutality tropes. Often, you’ll find all three in the same story together. It’s closely related to Big Brother is Watching, where the government is so powerful, and reaches into so many aspects of everyday life, that they see and record everything you do. Where Big Brother shapes every aspect of the society, however, down to the language of the citizens and the basic truths accepted as facts, Sinister Surveillance is more about the surveillance itself, and the ulterior motives behind it.

It’s not enough for the government to simply watch you, though. Even more important in some ways is the idea that you don’t know what they can and can’t see. The reason for this is the same reason why, in horror stories, we almost never see the monster until the very end–because our imagination makes things a lot scarier than they really are. If we the bad guys know the limitations of our government surveillance, we they can ~~safeguard our privacy and basic rights~~ game the system. We’re all afraid of the dark, not because of what’s actually there, but what could be.

The concept behind all this goes back to the Panopticon, a hypothetical prison where the prisoners know that the guards are constantly watching them, but can’t actually see any of the guards themselves. Proposed by the British philosopher Jeremy Bentham in the 1700s, the idea is to disempower the prisoners and empower the guards simply through the act of surveillance. If everything you do can be seen, and you don’t know exactly who’s watching, that puts a tremendous amount of social pressure on you to conform. As Michel Foucault put it:

The Panopticon creates a consciousness of permanent visibility as a form of power, where no bars, chains, and heavy locks are necessary for domination any more.

But if the prisoners are the citizens, and the guards are the government, how can such a system ever be democratic? How can the citizens of such a society ever give their informed consent? Well, that’s kind of the point. The government in dystopian stories is rarely democratic–it’s usually a dictatorship of some kind, or a system that turns well-meaning people into Knights Templar, showing how even the best of us die like animals when the game is rigged.

As benevolent the intentions of the government may initially be, it is nonetheless true that power corrupts, and absolute power corrupts absolutely. Just as the Panopticon takes power from the prisoners and concentrates it with the guards, so does universal surveillance grant dangerous amounts of power to the government–not because the act of surveillance is dangerous in itself, but because it brings out the worst in the people doing the surveillance.

In The Road to Serfdom, Freidrich Von Hayek pointed out that self-serving, ambitious, power-hungry people tend to rise in government a lot faster than people who have others’ best interests at heart, especially when so much power is concentrated in the government. That’s one of the biggest dangers of surveillance–and in stories where Sinister Surveillance is in play, the government has already passed that point.

I wish I could say that this trope is limited mostly to the realm of fiction, but unfortunately, that does not appear to be the case. These days, it’s impossible to talk about surveillance without getting political, even on a blog dedicated to books and writing. Because everything these days is online, it’s easier now than ever before for our governments to watch us. And if Edward Snowden’s claims are even partially correct, that’s exactly what they’re trying to do. Even more worrying are the indicators that they’re trying to do it in secret, such as this recent letter from Senators Wyden and Udall. The United States government has lied to us in the past about the extent of the PRISM surveillance program, and it would appear that they’re continuing to do just that.

Wherever you fall politically on PRISM or the Edward Snowden case, I think that Sinister Surveillance is a trope that we should all find profoundly disturbing. When George Orwell took this trope to its extreme logical conclusions in 1984, he did so to prevent that horrific social order from ever coming to pass. I wonder: only two or three generations after that book came out, have we forgotten its lessons already? Or do we need a new retelling to remind us? I fear that that retelling is taking place, not in the pages of a novel, but in real time on the major blogs and news sites.

I need to get out of Provo, but where to live next?

ProvoLogo_FullColor — … yeah, no thanks. Not yet, anyway.

It’s been almost six months since I moved back out to Provo, and I don’t think I’ll be staying here much longer. It’s a great place if you’re a Mormon college student in your early twenties, or married with kids and looking for a nice, quiet place to settle down, but for everything in between it’s just not the greatest.

So where am I going to go next? Honestly, I don’t have a clue. Probably somewhere in the United States, but I’m not ruling out the possibility of another overseas adventure. In fact, that’s exactly the sort of thing that I’d love.

But I’ve got to be honest here: I came back to the States mostly to find a girl. I don’t know about getting married or not–that’s like step twenty-five, while I’m still on step three–but I do know that next time I go overseas, I want to go with someone, preferably someone special. That’s what I learned while I was living in the Caucasus mountains, that an adventure is like ten times better when you have someone to share it with.

I may be opening up a little bit in this post, and I don’t want to give the wrong impression to the people I know who read it. It’s not that I’m uninterested in any of my female friends here, but so far, nothing has really worked out. Some of that is because I’m not as interested as I thought I was, but the reverse is probably just as true. Nothing wrong with that, and I still value all of my friendships. And hey, you never know–things can always change. But when you start to get sick of a place, that’s probably a good time to move on.

So what am I looking for? Ideally, a place with a lot of Mormons in their late twenties / early thirties, most of them young professionals or recent graduates. A place with a decent art scene, or that sort of vibe to it, where I can meet up with other artists / entrepreneurs like myself and be a part of that community. I really want to live in a place with mountains–my sister is moving to a town just out of Des Moines, and omigosh just from looking it up on Google Earth I know I could never live there. Barring that, I really love deserts, so I wouldn’t mind living in Arizona or New Mexico.

I’ve heard good things about Salt Lake City, so that’s pretty high on the list. I’ve got a couple of friends up that way, and lots of family as well. Other than that, I wonder if Saint George or Cedar City might be good places for a guy in my situation to live. I really love Utah, so if I could find another place out here besides Provo, that would be ideal. Moab, perhaps? Seems like a tourist town more than anything. Though if I could score a job at a hostel out there, that could be a lot of fun.

Texas is also fairly high on the list. Beautiful place, Texas. I’ve always loved driving through that country. Lots of Mormons too, apparently, though where I’d want to go exactly, I have no idea.

One place I absolutely do not want to go is Washington DC. I HATE that place, especially after my internship experience. It’s a great place to visit, and the museums and cultural stuff are amazing, but I never want to live there again.

Other than that … I’ve got a couple of friends who suggested Portland, but I dunno.

And honestly, a not insignificant part of me wants to go somewhere crazy, like Mongolia or the Czech Republic, or even back to Georgia. I’m making enough on my book sales right now that I could probably get a small apartment in Tbilisi and support myself entirely off of my ebook royalties alone. Better yet, I could arrange a long-term boarding situation back in the village, or out in Kutaisi, or maybe even up in Svaneti … but that’s probably just me missing the place. I miss it almost every day.

All I know for sure is that I absolutely cannot stay here in Provo much longer. If I do, I’ll either go crazy or get old and fat and complacent, and I’m not sure which is worse. I’ll stay here through the summer, just to save up some money, but when September comes around, I am getting out of here.

Captain Cosette by R. Bruce Sundrud

So I saw this book in my alsobots on Amazon a few months ago, and it looked interesting so I figured I’d give it a shot. The cover is admittedly pretty bad, but it has two of my favorite things in the universe (space and girls), and besides, I’ll sample just about anything. A few days later, I realized the sample folder on my Kindle was getting pretty big, so I decided to go through and clear some of it out.

Well, I ended up buying this one. The beginning really hooked me, and the rest of the book did not disappoint.

Captain Cosette is basically a Cinderella story set in space, except instead of getting glass slippers and going to the dance, Cosette goes to war and becomes a knock-out starship pilot. It’s military sci-fi with a lighter edge than Drake or Haldeman. And it’s good. I think I read from the 36% mark to the end without stopping. Sundrud is really good at making you care about his characters and then putting them in peril.

One thing that I really enjoyed were all the pulpy Renee Chevalier books that Cosette always reads, which were really just tongue-in-cheek references to modern pop-culture phenomena like Twilight and Casablanca. It broke the fourth wall at times, but I always found them hilarious, especially with some of the twists they add at the end.

Unlike some other sci-fi books that I’ve started recently and failed to finish, the science fictional elements here are not just window dressing–they really drive the plot. I thought the teaching machine was particularly interesting, especially when it … well, I won’t give away any spoilers. And of course, the lost colonies and border worlds were also fascinating. Cosette comes from a backwards farming planet, and the way she thinks about things at first, you really get the sense that this has been her whole universe. As she gradually comes to understand the geo- (astro?) politics of Union and Alliance, her awareness expands, and so does yours as the reader. It’s very cool.

There are a couple of things I wish this book had done a little better. The world is not nearly as immersive as I wanted it to be, and sometimes it feels like the characters are hurrying from place to place. Also, sometimes the characters seemed to blend together a bit. There was enough to differentiate them, but at times they sounded almost the same. None of these issues took much away from my overall enjoyment of the book, however. The story was solid.

So yeah, if you like the kind of stuff I like to write, you’re probably going to love this one. At $2.99 for the ebook, you really can’t go wrong. Even if you’re not a huge military sf fan, if you like Cinderella stories (and who doesn’t?), this one is definitely worth checking out.

Thoughts on writing advice generally

I’m working a swing shift job at a bakery outlet right now, loading and unloading trucks for the next day’s shipment. It’s a great job because 1) the pay is higher than most warehouse jobs, 2) it’s only 20 hours a week, 3) I’m the only guy there, so there’s lots of autonomy, and 4) I can listen to music and podcasts while I work.

Anyway, I was listening to a panel from this year’s LTUE last night, and at one point I actually got so mad with the panelists that I almost swore. In particular, there was one panelist who doesn’t really have any books out or any publication credits to speak of, but she was constantly (CONSTANTLY) chiming in with writing rules and writing advice, to the point where she started clashing with some of the big name authors on the panel.

The reason that made me angry is because I’ve been on the receiving end of a lot of bad advice. Not just advice about the craft of writing, which might be good individually but in the aggregate tends to feed your inner editor and kill your creative drive. I’ve heard a lot of really bad career advice, both from established professionals who have no clue how the industry is changing, and (more frequently) from unwashed newbies who spend more time promoting their last book than writing their next one. It’s gotten to the point where whenever anyone starts to give advice, I just roll my eyes and skim over whatever it is they’re trying to say.

This is not to say that I think I know everything and that now I can stop learning. I have no illusions about that. Just this past week, for example there was an excellent thread on the KBoards about cover design, with several designers chipping in with their insights. I admit, I skimmed a lot of the stuff the writers were saying, but the designers I stopped and paid attention to. There’s still a lot I have to learn when it comes to covers, as well as hiring the right kind of artists to do the job.

When it comes to the craft of writing, I’ve found that the best way to learn is to read a lot of really good books and pay attention to the things the authors do. For example, Louis McMaster Bujold has some really colorful ways to describe her characters’ mannerisms, such as having Lord Vorkosigan simultaneously smile at one character and frown at another. Jane Austen is a master of giving the one or two details that you need to feel like you know exactly what kind of a person each character is. David Drake can write action sequences that really make you feel like you’re there in the character’s head, and Orson Scott Card’s dialog is peerless.

And as for career advice, honestly, the best approach I’ve found is to just say “screw you all–I’m doing it my way!” The industry has changed so much in the past three years that no one–absolutely no one–knows anything.

Four years ago, I snubbed my nose at self-publishers and would have been horrified to learn I’d become one. Two years ago, I hated the term “self-publishing” and avoided it like the plague, using terms like “indie publishing” instead. Now, I don’t really care. I’m reaching readers, growing a fan-base, and making money, and that’s all that really matters.

Everyone seems to have an opinion, but the only way to have an informed opinion is to actually go out there and find out what works for you. So basically, I treat everyone’s advice with contempt unless they can demonstrate unequivocally that it’s worked for them. Even then, I pick and choose what I adopt for myself, based on what sits best with my own personal philosophy. In the end, I learn a lot more by rolling up my sleeves and getting my hands dirty than I do from following someone else.

All of this has combined to make me really loathe to give any advice. At Leading Edge, I’ve taken recently to reading ARCs and writing book reviews, rather than writing out those scathing story critiques like I used to. I rarely comment on blogs or message board communities, and when I do, I always feel like I have to include a disclaimer that this is my opinion, or this is what’s worked for me, or this has been my experience (and therefore may not apply generally). Sometimes, I see writers who are so caught up in stupid myths that I want to reach out and help them, but even then, I feel like there’s something restraining me.

The point is, if/when I succeed in this business, it will be in spite of the advice I’ve received, not because of it. I’ll consider almost anything, but whether I actually follow it … yeah, don’t hold your breath.

The Legend of Deathwalker by David Gemmell

legend_of_deathwalker I’m not even going to try to write a synopsis of this story. It’s just like all the other books in the Drenai series, which is why I love it so much. Basically, this one gives the story behind the rise of Ulric, khan of the Nadir, and the origin of the Nadir people. Interestingly enough, Druss the Legend plays a major role.

This was the last book in the Drenai Saga that I hadn’t read, so reading it was a very bittersweet experience. On the one hand, this one is just as good as all the other books in the series, and made me want to revisit Legend and some of the others. On the other hand, I knew that once I’d finished it, there wouldn’t be any more Drenai books left. So I took it slow for the first half, but naturally I finished it at a breathless late-night sprint a day or two later.

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about why I love David Gemmell’s books so much. There are many reasons, but I think the main reason is that his writing is honest. He strips away all the incidental stuff and gets right at the heart of the stuff that matters. He doesn’t pussyfoot around, either–if his characters do something despicable, he doesn’t make any excuses for them. He tells it like it is. This can make for a very brutal story, but it also makes for a very cathartic one.

The other reason I love his books so much is because he does such a good job depicting raw, unrepressed manhood–not the stupid stuff like driving big cars and eating meat, but manning up and facing your greatest fears. It’s about friendship, and honor, and fighting with all of your strength for something you believe in. It’s about all that raw, pent-up energy we all have, that animal urge that drives us to competitive sports and first person shooters, and channeling it for a heroic cause.

The craziest thing is that the fight itself is actually more important than whatever side the characters are fighting on. In this book, Druss is actually fighting to help bring about the rise of the Nadir khan who later invades his homeland and kills him on the walls of Dros Delnoch. None of that matters, though, because Druss doesn’t fight with malice. For him, it’s all about fighting for something, not against something, and the battle itself is just as important as the victory. I don’t think I can put it better than this:

“Can we win here?” Sieben asked, as the shaman’s image began to fade.

“Winning and losing are entirely dependent on what you are fighting for,” answered Shaoshad. “All men here could die, yet you could still win. Or all men could live and you could lose. Fare you well, poet.”

The best thing about David Gemmell’s books is the fact that none of the characters–not even the bad guys–are defined by their own evil. The Nadir are supposed to be the evil chaotic race of the Drenai universe, but when you come to understand what they’re fighting for, their hopes and dreams for a better future, you can really see what’s good in them. Likewise, the more civilized Gothir are kind of like the evil white men who want to put down the savages and keep them in their place, but there are good and honorable men among them too.

And yet, even though the two sides clash, and good men die on both sides, it somehow isn’t tragic. That’s the crazy part. It’s almost like you can feel the characters salute each other as they die in a good cause, the way Ulric gave Druss a proper funeral in Legend, even though the two were blood-sworn enemies. In David Gemmell’s world, honor and courage are more important than life or money. Everyone dies; dying well is more important than living without honor.

This book is incredible. As I was reading it, I decided it was the best David Gemmell book I’ve ever read–which is something I do every time I read one of his books. I feel like I’m a better man for having read them. If he had written a hundred books in this series, I would happily read them all. The fact that there are no more new ones deeply saddens me, but I know I’ll revisit these stories again in the future.

I need to read more. A lot more.

Recently, I’ve come to the conclusion that I need to read a lot more than I have been. I’ve read a couple of books in the past few months, but to take things to the next level I feel like I should be reading at least one or two novels a week.

I came to this conclusion last week after visiting the Provo Library to pick up a copy of Gettysburg (the movie based on The Killer Angels) that was on hold for me. Unfortunately, someone had misplaced it, but since I was there I took some time to browse the shelves.

Holy cow, it’s been a while since I was surrounded by actual physical books. I get about 60% to 70% of my books nowadays on my kindle, so browsing through the shelves, I felt like a kid in a candy shop. I picked up the last Drenai book that I haven’t yet read (finished it today, actually), a classic by Heinlein, and an Alliance-Union novel by C.J. Cherryh.

The thing about physical library books, though, is that if you don’t read and return them in time, they tend to cost you money. LOTS of money. I can’t tell you how much I’ve paid in library fines over the years–it seems like every time I go to check something out, I have to pay a couple of bucks. What can I say–I’m not a very disciplined reader. But this time, I figured I would actually go through and do it. That’s why I limited myself to just three (or was it four?).

If you’re a writer, reading voraciously is essential. Not only is it a great way to pick up new tricks, it’s absolutely vital in keeping your sense of story honed and sharp. I wonder how much of what we call “writers block” would actually best be solved, not by just writing through it, but taking some time to just immerse yourself in a good book and recharge your creative batteries by filling your mind with story.

Another reason to read is that it helps to keep you from being stretched too thin by online distractions and obligations. I picked up this tip from Jeff VanderMeer in his writing book, Booklife. It’s a good one. Basically, if you find yourself wasting too much time on the internet, cycling endlessly through your email, your facebook, your twitter, webcomics, message boards, blog aggregator, sales stats etc etc–the best way to break free of that addictive cycle is to sit down and read a book.

A couple of days later, I was at Leading Edge and noticed that they have a whole bunch of unread ARCs in their cabinet. A couple of small publishers send them stuff every couple of months, and it tends to accumulate, especially in the summer when most of the students are gone. Well, I ended up coming home with three of them, with a promise that I’d read and review a couple before the next issue goes out in June.

Not that I’m complaining–not at all. In fact, I’m excited. I’ve been doing a lot to rework my routine recently, mostly having to do with writing in the mornings and finding a good place outside of my apartment to get stuff done. I find that it helps to take frequent breaks when writing, so if I can fill those with reading instead of useless internet browsing, I figure I’ll be in good shape. I’ll let you know in a couple of weeks how that goes.

In the meantime, I’ve got to go, but you can expect another squeeing fanboy review of David Gemmell soon–as in, probably tomorrow. I just finished the last remaining bok in the Drenai series that I hadn’t yet read, and holy crap, it is AMAZING. It makes me want to go through and read the whole series all over again! At the same time, I’m so sad that there aren’t any more of these books left anymoer–if Gemmell had written a hundred Drenai books, I would have read (and gone fanboy crazy over) every last one of them. Sadly, that is not to be. But maybe when my soul passes over to the Void, I can sit at his feet and hear them direct from the mouth of the master … okay I’d better end this before I go all fanboy again. Later.

Hey! Are you an aspiring writer / artist / creative whatever?

If you are, you really really really need to check out this webcomic about the three jaguars.

It’s about the three main voices in every professional artist’s head, and how they bicker and play off of each other. As someone whose been in the writing business for a few years, I can say that it’s absolutely spot on (and not just because they’re anthropomorphized jaguars). Seriously, this webcomic needs to be like a primer for all creative types or something.

The thing I’ve learned the most by following this webcomic has to do with the marketing voice. I’ve always had it in the back of my mind that marketing is evil. And if you do it wrong, it really is. But if you do it right, it’s actually pretty amazing:

…your goal in marketing is to create sustainable relationships with people who want you to succeed; in short, to seek patrons, rather than one-time customers. To do that, you can’t be focused on the money or the one-time sale. You want to inspire customer loyalty. You want people to be invested in your success. You want them to feel special … because they are.

A lot of the stuff I do, like keeping this blog, or putting Author’s Notes at the end of all my books, comes back to this idea of making meaningful connections with people. I just never saw it as marketing. But if marketing yourself is really about focusing on people rather than obsessing about sales, that’s totally something that I can do–something that I’m excited to do!

The character I can relate to the most is probably Business Manager. It’s the entrepreneurial spirit I can trace back to my grandpa, who started his own oil company in West Texas and was successful enough to put all us grandkids through private school. But Artist is definitely in there as well–it’s why I’m always jumping from project to project, driving my inner business manager crazy.

So yeah, if you’re a creative type, you’ll definitely want to check out this webcomic. It’s written by the self-published author whose books briefly got pulled from Amazon during the Space Marine controversy (fortunately for all of us, she held out and won). Lots of good stuff there–she really knows what she’s talking about.

In the meantime, let me leave you with this incredible piece of orchestral trance music. It’s quite possibly the most epic thing I discovered last week. The video is pretty good too.

Take care!

Starliner by David Drake

starliner Welcome to the Empress of Earth, the finest luxury liner in all of settled space. Whether you’re alien or human, first class or economy, there is a place on the ship for you. Just watch out for those Grantholmers and Nevassans–those planets are about to go to war, but don’t worry, the Empress is strictly neutral territory. The envoys from Earth will see to that. And as for the rumors that one of those sides might try to hijack the ship, I’m sure the crew is capable enough to deal with such threats. Even if they are unarmed…

I saw this book on my also-boughts on Amazon, so I decided to pick it up. It was an enjoyable read. David Drake is very good at showing competent characters dealing with all sorts of complicated problems, operating within a strict chain of command while sometimes bending the rules a bit to get the job done.

The book is really a series of small vignettes, all tied together through the main viewpoint character, Ran Colville. There is an overarching storyline about the Empress’s role as a coveted pawn in a larger interstellar war, but that only really drives the story at the very end. Really, it’s more of a slice-of-life story about the crew of the ship, punctuated by all of the strange and exotic stops along the way–and boy, are there plenty of those!

Even though the Empress is neutral, she’s a potentially valuable military asset that both sides in the Grantholm-Nevassan war want to capture. To complicate matters further, some of the passengers are dignitaries from either side. At one point, there’s a romance between the peacenik daughter of a Nevassan diplomat and the son of a Grantholmer nobleman who is honor-bound to fight in the war. That subplot was a lot of fun.

As you can imagine, there’s plenty of violence. And really, what would you expect from one of the world’s best military science fiction writers? Drake does a really good job showing the adrenaline-soaked excitement of combat, as well as all the ugliness. Even the mooks get a viewpoint from time to time, and when they die, it’s messy and traumatic. For that reason, the violence feels very realistic, especially in how it affects the main characters.

Ran is something of a player, so there is a fair amount of explicit sex (including a bit of inter-species action). Drake doesn’t mince words or shy away from the gritty details–he puts it all on the page as matter-of-factly as any other aspect of life. The sex was brief enough that it didn’t really bother me that much, but Ran’s relationship toward one of his coworkers takes a turn at the end that seemed to come completely out of left-field. I could understand why, for the purposes of the story, it had to happen, but the way it was handled I just didn’t buy it.

That was probably my biggest gripe. If I had another, it would be that the story seems to meander a bit in the first two-thirds, but the world-building was interesting enough that it didn’t really bother me. Overall, it was a fun, light read (well, light for military sf). The ebook version is free on Amazon, so it’s definitely worth picking up. If you haven’t read any David Drake yet, this isn’t a bad place to start.

Chris Hadfield is my commander

And he always will be.

That is all.

Thoughts on making a living as a writer

As many of you know, my biggest life goal (besides obtaining a signed first-edition copy of David Gemmell’s Legend) is to make a living telling stories that I love. Accomplishing that goal is no small task. For the last five years, I’ve been focused on that goal like a hellfire missile, and as of right now it continues to elude me.

I’m getting closer, though. I’ve got 14 ebooks out, hopefully 18 by the end of the summer, and they’re actually selling. I won’t go too much into specifics, but my gross income is about 30% to 40% of what I’d need to cover all my expenses without another job.

Granted, I’m a young single guy with good health and no dependents, living on a shoestring budget in the cheapest housing in one of the cheapest states in the US, but that’s not an insignificant accomplishment.

Right now, I’m reinvesting all of that into the business, in order to boost sales and to avoid self-employment tax. But if I have a difficult month and need something to fall back on, my books are generating a fair amount of passive income, and that income is growing. If I keep doing what I’m doing, and things stay on more or less the same trajectory, I expect that I’ll be making enough to support myself in one or two years.

That’s actually a little better than the timetable I set a year ago, where I determined to go full-time by 2016. Then again, I also set a goal to be married by then, and I have no idea how that will change things. I suppose my spouse’s income would be able to supplement my own, but then there’s insurance and taxes and all sorts of other expenses that I can expect to go way up.

(At the same time, I have this wild dream of running off with my wife to some remote part of the world and spending a couple of years on some crazy-insane adventure, like trekking across Mongolia, or joining a Bedouin tribe, or couchsurfing across Europe. The world is a very different place outside of the US, and the cost of living in much of the world is significantly lower. Especially in the developing world, people know how to make do and be happy with much, much less.)

Even if I suffer a major setback, like an irreversible drop in sales or a technological shift that made my current business model obsolete, making a living is no longer a pie-in-the-sky sort of dream. It’s within reach, and I think I have a pretty good idea how I’ll get there.

First of all, it’s probably not going to be a sudden, earth-shaking event. It’s much more likely that I’ll ease into it gradually, first as a fallback for months when work is slow, and then as a way to pay off my bills while I keep a part-time job for spending money. One day, I’ll wake up and realize that it’s been five or six weeks since I’ve done anything but write, and then I’ll open up my budget and realize that I’ve arrived.

As I get married and start a family, my expenses will no doubt rise, and I or my wife may have to take another job for a while to make ends meet. Then again, if book sales continue to snowball with each new release, then we might be able to time it so that the kids start arriving just as the writing income really starts to take off. Even then, book sales fluctuate so much from month to month that until we have a significant amount of money in savings, we’re always going to feel like we’re a couple of weeks away from having to find another job.

And then, with the writing bringing in a comfortable six-figure income, we might finally be able to afford a house. It’s almost impossible to get a mortgage as a self-employed freelancer, so I fully expect to pay for most of the house up front. Good thing I don’t want to live in a city.

Of course, it’s also possible that the writing will never bring in a six-figure income. Science fiction is a relatively small genre, and the only stories I really care to tell are the ones that take place on other worlds. But that’s okay–as long as I’m able to support myself and my family, I’ll be happy. Anything above that, and it’s not about the money. In fact, it’s really not about the money right now.

The point of all this is that I don’t expect there to be a moment where I’ve suddenly “arrived.” If anything, it’s just going to be a continuation of what I’m doing right now, scaled up to meet life’s changing demands.

And you know what? I’m okay with that.

My resume might look a bit checkered, and job interviewers may raise their eyebrows when they see that I’m a college graduate, but these odd jobs give me a lot more flexibility than a stable “day job” with insurance and all that. I like being able to take a week or two off to do nothing but write, even if the off-time is unintentional on my part. I know how to be flexible, and I’m quite comfortable living a lifestyle where I don’t know where I’ll be getting my next paycheck.

And to friends and family who are concerned because I’m almost thirty and don’t have a full-time job … don’t be. I’m following my dream, and my dream is within reach. Everything else is just a stepping stone. I have a career, I’ve taken full responsibility for it, and I’ve turned it into something profitable. If making a living as a writer is a bit like making grizzly bear soup, I’ve already killed the bear.

In related news, I learned this week that I’ve been pirated in Japan. I’m not sure whether to be flattered or alarmed, but since my books are 1) available from multiple retailers 2) relatively inexpensive, and 3) DRM-free (on all the sites that allow it, anyway), I’m not too concerned about it cutting into my income. I am worried about people downloading my books from an unsafe site that might give them a virus or something, but people will be people and there’s not much I can do about that.

If anything, it’s just another sign that I’ve arrived–or rather, that I’m exactly where I’ve wanted to be all along, and it’s just a matter of making things work.