Tag: Girls and Dating

Falling in love: does it actually happen?

I like to tell people that I don’t believe in the concept of “falling in love”–that true love isn’t something you fall into, it’s something you grow into.  The thing you fall into is called “infatuation,” which by itself doesn’t last long.  It’s happened to me many times, and look at how single I am.

However, I was listening to this week’s episode of This American Life, and the first story got me to think about the concept of “falling in love.” The story was about an American exchange student in China who went back a year later in order to chase down this girl he’d met over there.  Miraculously, he found her, and in a short period of time, they married each other.

The story doesn’t end there, though, nor does it gloss over or ignore their struggles since getting married.  In fact, they’re both surprisingly candid.  Even though they could have broken up, though, they said that the incredible story of how they got together kept them going until they worked through the crisis.  The narrator finished:

..Eric and Yuen-Yuen had to make that same transition that all couples do, from the crazy, in-love stage to the other thing—the hard part of love. And it’s when you’re in that struggle that you most need the story of how you’re meant to be, because the alternative–that the person you’re with could be one any one of hundreds or thousands of other people–well, if that’s true, then why even try?

This got me to wondering–is there something besides sentimental hogwash to the notion of falling in love? Is it a necessary myth? Or is it more than a myth? Growth is generally something you control, but if all you can say is that you and your significant other “grew” into where you are today, is that enough to keep you going?

Snarkiness aside, I suppose it’s different for everybody. Some people have to believe they were fated to be together, while others abhor anything but the idea that love is something that grew slowly and steadily, without crazy flashes in the pan.

The important thing, I suppose, is that when it comes to love, we all have to have a story that we tell ourselves. Without a story to help us make sense why we’re with our significant other, it’s possible to think about leaving them.

By definition, every story has a beginning, a middle, and an end. In a love story, I suppose that “falling in love” happens in the beginning, while “growing in love” has to do with the middle, while the end is this hopeful, optimistic future, full of wonderful possibility. No one part makes any sense without the two others, but together they must give a comforting sense of direction, of destiny.

So maybe there is something to the idea of “falling in love.” I don’t think for one second that the initial “falling in love” is the most important part of any functional romance, but I’ll grant that it has its place in the story.

Finishing and beginning

Classes for this semester are over, I’ve turned in all my papers, taken all my exams but one, and now I feel like I have this giant void in my life.  I was walking around on campus today with literally no idea where I was going or what I should do.

It was…strange.

With school out, I’m getting ready to leave Provo for good.  I won’t be coming back for the winter, seeing as I’ll be in Washington DC.  As for post graduation plans, nothing’s solid, but I probably won’t be coming back to Utah.  Not for a while, at least.

It’s exciting and scary, but mostly exciting.  2010 is going to mark the end of my academic career and my first venture into the real world.  Beyond this internship, I have no idea what I’m going to do, but I’m starting to formulate some plans.  Here’s what I’ve got so far:

Post-graduation options:

  • Go to grad school
  • Work side jobs while writing novels
  • Travel across the Middle East for a year or two
  • Start a career in Washington DC

The first option (grad school) isn’t going to happen right away.  I’ve already decided that I’m not going to go to grad school until I have a definite plan for what I want to accomplish with it (an “exit strategy,” if you will).  Interning in Washington might give me an idea of what I want to study, but I’ll probably take a year off from academics just the same.

The second option (side jobs & writing) is an interesting option that I haven’t really thought through.  It would involve a lot more focus on writing and trying to get published, but it would also involve a lot of uncertainty until my writing career really gets launched.  However, I’d have a lot of flexibility in where I could live.  I could stay in Washington DC, or move back to Massachusetts, or come back to Utah.

The third option (travel) is definitely the most exciting and adventurous of the four.  It would involve living in a Middle Eastern country for a year or two, teaching English to support myself while I see the country and work on my writing.  Syria, Lebanon, Jordan, Egypt, even the Gulf…man, it would be awesome!  I have friends from the MESA program who are doing it, too.

Man, that would be fun–and definitely give me a lot to write about, besides awesome life experiences!  Finding a girl and settling down, though…probably not going to happen until I get back.  That’s the downside.

The fourth option (career) is entirely dependent on what happens this winter in Washington.  If I find that I love what I’m doing with my internship, I’ll probably look to get a job with WINEP or an organization like it.   I’ve got to admit, it would certainly give me a comforting degree of direction and certainty if such were the case–to graduate with a job in hand, doing something that I love.

At the same time, however, there’s a danger that a career in this field might not leave me with much time to pursue my writing.  My dream job is still to be a full-time novelist, and I need to remember that while I’m in Washington.  If I find that my work with WINEP leaves me with little to no time to write, I’ll have to re-evaluate my plans.

So really, this internship in Washington is going to be more about testing the waters than anything else.  I’m going to have to periodically ask myself 1) whether this is the kind of work I find enjoyment and personal fulfillment doing, 2) whether this is the kind of work I can balance with a writing career, and 3) what opportunities are available for me in this particular field.  Since it all depends on how the internship goes, I can anticipate one of three things happening:

Possible reactions to my internship:

  1. I love the work that I do for my internship.
  2. I hate the work that I do for my internship.
  3. I am utterly indifferent to the work I do for my internship.

If #1 is the case, I should focus on getting a job from my internship connections, provided I can still make time to write while doing this kind of work.  If not, I can probably still find a similar career path that does allow me enough time to pursue a writing career on the side.

If #2 is the case, it means that policy making and research is not my thing, but I still have a passion for the Middle East.  Taking a year or two off to travel will become a very appealing option at that point.

If #3 is the case, it means that I’m going to have to completely retool.  I have no idea what I’ll end up doing if this happens.  Travel, maybe–but what good would it do me, if a Middle East related career doesn’t interest me?  Maybe I’ll take a year off to work on my math and go back to grad school for astronomy.  Maybe I’ll work odd jobs like Robert Charles Wilson until I get published.  Maybe I’ll become a hobo and vanish into obscurity.  I don’t know.

Whatever happens, writing is going to be a priority.  If I can make an adequate living writing fiction, I’m going to do it.  Which makes me wonder–what does that mean about all my other plans?  Is all of this Middle East stuff just a temporary fix until I get published, hopefully in the next five years?  Or is it something more permanent?

I have absoultely no idea, but this post is already getting pretty long, so I’ll cut it here.  Regardless what happens, however, I’m 100% confident that everything will work out in the way that it should.  These life changes are more exciting than they are scary.  I’m looking forward to the new year very much!

Convention jitters

World Fantasy starts in less than 72 hours, and I’m getting nervous about it.  Really nervous.  This is the first big-time science fiction convention I’ve ever been to, and I’m worried that it will be too intimidating, or that I’ll make a fool of myself, or that I won’t put myself out there enough, or…

All the same, I’m expecting to have fun.  Lots of fun. 🙂

But between now and 5:00 am Thursday morning (when we take off for California), I have to: 1) grade 20 papers, 2) take a midterm, 3) write two essays, 4) run at least 30 regressions, 5) read 2 poli sci articles, and 6) finish American Babylon and write up a report on the last three chapters.

Yeah.  Not fun (except the regressions–what can I say, I’m a nerd).

In unrelated news, I met an interesting girl at Leading Edge last week.  She’s at least as much of an sf&f fan as I am, and one of the very, very few girls I’ve met who prefers science fiction over fantasy.  Somehow, she convinced me to read The Dispossessed by Ursula K. LeGuin with her (or maybe I convinced her to read it with me?), but I started it tonight, and it’s really good.

Technically, I’ve got a class for Washington Seminar that I should go to tomorrow…but I can skip it and listen to the mp3 while I’m driving to California.  Don’t want to miss Leading Edge this week, for obvious reasons.

Speaking of which, if I don’t go to sleep right now, I’m going to be barely functional for the next two days.  Not good.  G’night.

Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen

I think the first line of this novel sums it up better than I ever could:

It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of a good fortune, must be in want of a wife.

I’ve been familiar with the story of Pride and Prejudice for a long time, but this was the first time I’d read the original.  Even though I don’t usually go for Regency romances, I have to say that I enjoyed this book very much!

Jane Austen has a genius for character.  She knows exactly what little mannerism to show or what description to give to make her characters come alive.  At several points in the book, I paused and said “holy cow, that’s just like so and so,” or “haha, I know exactly what this person is like.” At no point did I feel hit over the head or dragged through a long info dump explaining this or that character’s background.  Of all the possible details she could share, Austen always chooses the exact ones you need to get a clear, distinct picture–no more, no less.

Austen drives her story with some snappy, entertaining dialogue.  Far from being sappy or sentimental, her main character, Elizabeth, is snarky and spirited, and she clashes with a lot of people in ways that are much more interesting (and mature) than typical girl drama.  Be that as it may, I found it entertaining to compare Elizabeth’s dating/relationship experiences with my own.  As different as things were back then, in some very interesting ways they are still the same.

I did feel that the novel slowed down a bit in the middle, probably because that was when Elizabeth went on the tour of Derbyshire with her relatives and left behind most of the other characters that interested me.  Also (since I am a straight guy), Mr. Darcy didn’t really turn me on much, so Elizabeth’s gradual change of mind as she toured his house wasn’t as engaging to me.

One thing that confuses me, having read this book, is why women all over the place set up Mr. Darcy as the ideal male.  What exactly is his appeal?  He’s a little rough around the edges, has an independent streak, speaks his mind even when doing so would be rude, and is constantly aloof from everyone else.  Is this what women find so appealing about him?  I can see how the “Beauty and the Beast” syndrome can also be a turn-on–Elizabeth essentially wins him over by taming him–but that has less to do with who he is than how Elizabeth changes him.  Do women go for a guy who they have the power to change?  Is that what it is?  I’m still a bit confused.

One thing made me a little mad, and it had nothing to do with the book at all; it had to do with the blurb on the back.  It reads:

One of the most universally loved and admired English novels, Pride and Prejudice, was penned as a popular entertainment.  But the consummate artistry of Jane Austen (1775-1817) transformed this effervescent tale of rural romance into a witty, shrewdly observed satire of English country life that is now regarded as one of the principal treasures of English literature.

Austen’s “consummate artistry” transformed this novel from “popular entertainment” to “one of the principal treasures of English literature”?  Come on.  That statement is as pompous as it is illogical.  Once her book came out in print, Austen “transformed” nothing–the only thing that changed was the way people looked at it.  It started out as a popular genre novel, like anything by Rowling or Steele or Grisham or King, and when the literati decided to claim it, they rebranded it as something else.

What irks me is this idea that “popular entertainment” is somehow inherently devoid of literary worth.  Come on, people–virtually all the “great authors” before 1920 were well-read and well-loved in their day, among the masses as much as the literary elite.  It’s not a sin to make money writing books.

Overall, I enjoyed this book very much.  Just as Lord of the Rings is the quintessential fantasy novel, Pride and Prejudice is probably the lodestar of the romance genre.  I was pleased to find that it’s not a book that only women can enjoy!

Breaking 90k and other mundane excitements

(I almost always have trouble figuring out titles for these blogs posts.  I mean, my writing life isn’t all that exciting–I just write.  Check out my study abroad blog from last year for true (if old) excitement).

I broke 90k words in Bringing Stella Home today.  According to my goal of 120k, that’s the 3/4 mark.  Yay!  I’m happy to say I’m going strong, and will probably “finish” this thing in a couple of weeks.

I say “finish” because it needs a LOT of work.  Oh yeah.  Not even ready for the alpha readers yet.

But I’m excited for the story.  Dave Wolverton at CONduit this past weekend suggested full and complete immersion as a way to write well.  I think that applies here: without school or a job, I basically write all day.

Speaking of which, I haven’t quite gotten up to doing 4k words steadily each day.  Right now, I’m hovering at around 3k, which is twice as much as my daily wordcount during the school year, but not yet up to where I want it to be.

However, getting up to that level is like training your muscles.  Through a number of small, intangible things, I feel that I’m working myself up to the 4k/day level.  

For example, I’ve been opening my word document and plugging out the first few hundred words BEFORE I open a web browser and waste an hour of time checking out my favorite blogs and websites.  That’s progress.

I’ve also started writing more in the time that I set aside to write.  These days, I usually write for a couple hours from 11pm to 2pm, take lunch and do something to recharge my creative batteries, do some more writing in the midafternoon (usually not too much), then take dinner, head out to the library (because the parking gate opens at 7pm) and write until about 11:30pm when the LRC closes.

In each of those three blocks of time, I used to be getting around 800 to 1,200 words done.  Today, from 11am to 1pm I wrote about 1,500.  Progress.

The bar says that I only did about 2,9k today, but that was because a good friend of mine is going active duty in the Air Force and his farewell party was tonight.  Also, Leading Edge took up the 7pm to 9pm slot.  So, without those things, it probably would have been 4k.

However, I’ve noticed something interesting: doing the math, 4k/day equates to just over 120k per month.  120k is a freaking novel!  Taking out Sundays, that’s still over 100k, which is also an acceptable novel length.  

So…if I were really doing 4k/day, would I be writing a rough draft of a novel each month?  Or are most published writers doing less than 4k words of new material each day?  I wouldn’t be surprised–this is not a business you get into because of your glowing math skills.

Regardless, 4k/day is still my goal.  Heck, if I get used to writing that much and find that the practice improve my craft, I might even go up to 6k/day.

Oh, and one more mundane excitement: Charlie got freaked out by a spider today and had me come over to hunt it down.  After sprawling out on her bathroom floor and looking under all the appliances, I didn’t find it–but I did find the hole that it probably escaped through.  I didn’t think it was much of a deal, until I read this post from Miss Snark’s archives.  So…I may start making it a practice to shake out my shoes from now on, especially since my room in my sister’s apartment is slightly buggy.

Fortunately, I usually wear my old pair of Birkenstocks these days.  Awesome footwear.  I quite literally love them to pieces.

“That’s what it looks like when the infection sets in.”

So said Howard Tayler at CONduit today when he saw the expression on my face at the Aspiring writers Q&A panel.  We chatted a bit afterward, and he said something very encouraging: that if I continue to pursue my writing career with the same hunger he saw on my face, he believes I will be successful.  Awesome!

This weekend, I attended CONduit 2009 in Salt Lake.  It was my first con experience, and I had a great time!  Besides being just plain fun, it was very educational and inspiring.

I felt a bit unnerved at first to be surrounded by so many people that I barely knew, in a comfort-zone shattering kind of way.  I went up with  Charlie and Laura, though, and it helped to have friends sharing the experience.  By Saturday, we were all getting around very well.  By the end, I figured that I did know a lot of people there–and, surprisingly, that a lot of people recognized me.

I came away with a TON of ideas and things learned!  Here are just a few of them:

  • One of the panelists on Friday suggested this revision method: use search-and-replace to color all filler words (such as “really,” “just,” “very,” “was”; basically, the words I always overuse on this blog).  That way, you can easily see which sentences you need to rewrite.
     
  • Howard and Sandra Tayler mentioned, almost in passing, how they made it a matter of prayer before deciding to go full time on the web comic thing.  I definitely need to include the Lord more as I try to figure out how this writing thing is going to fit into my life.
     
  • In their Saturday panel, Howard made a very interesting remark about cultivating your personal image.  I realized that if I want to be seen as a professional by editors and agents, I need to adjust my wardrobe and appearance accordingly.  I don’t necessarily have to go the suit-and-tie route–Howard’s  image involves jeans and a button-up shirt–but my dress and appearance should say “I am competent, sharp, and serious about what I do.”
     
  • Dan Willis had a very interesting suggestion for writers: get and use business cards.  Networking is one of the most important business activities that aspiring writers can, should, and must engage in, so using business cards at conventions is very important.  It sounds so obvious, but I’d never given it much thought.   I’ll have to get some printed up for myself before I go to World Fantasy and Worldcon later this year. 
     
  • Between panels, I got into a fascinating conversation with Eric James Stone about networking at these conventions.  From that conversation, I learned how important it is to be genuine and personal as you network, to listen more than you talk, and to never see people as mere stepping stones for your career.  He got an anthology contract with Kevin J. Anderson through a con, and he never approached him with that attitude–ever.  Other people he saw who did, Anderson treated politely but never contacted.  You should certainly have a pitch ready, but you should also give time for contacts to develop.  Over time, people will remember your face and recognize you at these events.

conduit2009-jawaConventions are definitely great for networking, but I absolutely hate walking up to a stranger and asking for favors.  It makes me very nervous.  As a result, I’ve adopted the philosophy of asking myself what I can offer the person I’m trying to connect with, rather than asking something of them.  I tried to follow this philosophy at CONduit, even if all I could offer was a compliment on something they’d said on a panel.

Using this strategy, I was able to get into a lot of interesting, genuine conversations with some of the big names at the con.  Charlie, Laura, and I got into a long, interesting conversation with L. E. Modessitt at one point.  He gave me some advice on women, which Charlie found hilarious (he must have seen us bickering/bantering earlier).  Had some good conversations with Dave Wolverton as well–he probably recognized me as the crazy fanboy who had him sign a poster of his first (now out of print) novel.  It was also good to see Brandon and talk with him–I thanked him for his helpful (if harsh) comments on my English 318 final.  Other people like James Dashner and Julie Wright recognized me from LTUE, which was really cool.

If people in the local scene are starting to recognize my face and my name, I must be doing something right.  That’s very encouraging.  Plus, the convetion was just plain fun. To top it off, the guy in the jawa costume was awesome.  All around, good times.  Very good times.

Many Bothans died to bring you this weekend

img_5998This past week was pretty crazy.  Tests, papers, homework…BLEARGH.  Less than satisfying.  What’s more, I was starting to get cabin fever from being in Provo so long.  Every day, doing the same old thing, going the same old places, seeing the same old sights…

…Then I got a call from my friend Ben Fisher, saying that everyone from the old Capitol House was going down for a camping trip near Moab.  Would I like to come?

HECK YES!!!

I basically dropped everything to run away with these guys.  First, I had a late paper that I had to finish–stayed up until 5am Friday to write it, took a 3 hour nap, then went to class.  CRAZY.  Emailed it to professor Ricks, with “many Bothans died to bring you this paper” in the body.  Got my coworkers to cover for me so I could get out early, met up with Ben, and then we loaded up our car with the girls and the camping stuff and basically ran down to catch Steve, Warren, Mike, and the others, who were already at the campsite.

campfireWhat an awesome weekend!  Ben had brought a couple of dutch ovens and tons and TONS of good food!  Dinner was much better than the stereotypical hot dogs and smores (though we did have smores in the morning).  We had cobler, sweet and sour chicken, and fried rice for dinner–awesome!  Plus, it was fun just to hang out around the campfire and talk.  Good times.

We laid out some tarps on the sandy ground, then threw down our sleeping bags and had a big bivouac under the stars.  I fell asleep as Ben was telling us all a story that had something to do with galoshes…I don’t really remember it all that well actually…and then I woke up a couple of hours later and didn’t sleep again the whole night.  I hadn’t brought a mattress, and man, the ground was hard…ugh.  Note to self–get a better sleeping bag and some kind of a camping mattress.  Mike Lebben was the smartest–he brought a cot.

hanging out at ArchesGot up early, restarted the campfire, and we had a good breakfast–biscuits and gravy, and then smores a little while later.  Good times.  We took off a little later and went up to Arches National Park to do some hiking.

We checked out Delicate Arch and Balancing Rock, then did some rock climbing out near Sandstone Arch.  Lots of fun.  I got sunburned really bad (of course), but the weather was really nice!  Not too hot, with a good breeze up near the top of the mountain.

hanging out near balancing rockThis was my first time at Arches, and despite some problems with the parking, it was a lot of fun.  The desert around Arches reminds me a lot of Petra–lots of sandy red rocks in weird formations, making for relatively easy climbing.  In fact, the whole trip reminded me a lot of Jordan and Petra.

One of the most interesting things about these trips is the social dynamic and getting to know new people.  I knew all the guys from the capitol house, but I met a few new people as well.  Natascha was there (she kept telling me to take a candid picture of her, then posed!  The pictures above are some of the few ones where she didn’t know I was pointing the camera at her), and her sister Hannah, who I hadn’t met before, plus her good friend Beth, who always bugs me about the one time I didn’t sub for her at the MTC cafeteria when it was her birthday (for consolation, I told her I was fired the next year–I think it made her feel vindicated to hear that), plus a couple of other friends of the other guys.   It was also good to see the guys from the capitol house again.  Probably my favorite part of the trip was hanging out around the campfire, or the conversations we had driving the three hours up and back.

In a lot of ways, the weekend was a roller coaster.  Beth commented that she was really surprised that all of us from the old Capitol House, with our strong personalities, get along as friends without tearing each other to pieces.  It was a valid comment–me and Warren weren’t getting along this weekend, for some reason.  I think I was still stressed out about the past week, plus I just haven’t hung out with him a lot recently.  So that was one of the lows of the weekend.  Another low was getting up Sunday morning, after we’d gotten back, and finding out that I had a 102 degree fever.  Not too much fun.

Still, there were quite a few highs.  On the way back from Moab, Natascha and her sister got me talking about my mission, and I shared a TON of old mission stories with them.  Good times, even if I was more than a little loopy (or perhaps it was BECAUSE I was so loopy…).  Also, when I got back, I found out that I’d gotten a letter from the English department–turns out I won first place in the Mayhew short story specialty contest!!!  WOOHOO!!!  Awesome!

So, anyways, that was my weekend.  Basically, it was like half of a summer rolled up in 2 days.  It was SOOO good to take a break and get out of Provo!  Good times!

Slow but steady

Okay, quick post before I go to bed.

Things are progressing in this novel, slowly but surely, as you can see from the wordcount.  Unlike past weeks, I’m not pushing myself too hard, mostly because I’ve got a lot of schoolwork right now and if I were to spend much more time on this novel, I would neglect a lot of the more important stuff.  Even though my course load is relatively light this semester, I’m a senior and I’m really not as motivated to do this stuff as I used to be.  I get done what needs to get done, but just barely.

I have been successfully getting up early, however.  And I’ve discovered something very interesting: I’m more productive when I have less free time.  Thursday, I didn’t have class until noon, so when I got on the computer at about 6:30 to write, I opened up the email, opened up facebook…and, by the time I had to leave for class, I had only written about 430 words.  Disgusting.  But today, when I had class at 9:00 am and still had my Arabic homework to do, I got in about 700 words in half an hour.

I still have a lot of self discipline to learn, I guess. 😛  The scary thing is that my idea, up to this point, has been to keep my time open in the summer so that I’ll be able to write.  Err…yeah.  We’ll see how that goes.

I’ve been getting a lot of comments back from my alpha readers on Genesis Earth, and it’s been REALLY fun!  Even the criticism–as long as it’s helpful criticism, I really appreciate it.  This one girl in my ward asked me if she could be an alpha reader, then read the whole thing in only a couple of days.  She had a LOT of positive comments–in fact, almost all of her comments were positive–and she said she really loved it!  So much so, in fact, that she said she was having withdrawals, so I sent her The Phoenix of Nova Terra v1.2.  Hopefully, getting her comments back will give me motivation to pick up that old thing and rework it…goodness knows it needs it.  Needs it bad.

My first two novels, The Phoenix of Nova Terra and Genesis Earth are completely different in some ways, but very similar in others.

<spoiler alert>

They both have an important romantic element, and they both have generally positive endings.  The book I’m writing now is something of a tragedy, at least at it’s core, and there is a completely different dynamic there.  No love stories, no happy resolutions–lots of pain, lots of violence, lots of grappling with difficult issues.

</spoiler alert>

I suppose it’s good to try out a lot of different things early on in your writing career.  That’s what I’m doing.  At the same time, though…I get feedback on the one novel, and I kind of want to work on it instead of the one right in front of me!  And when I think about what I did right in the one I finished, I look at the one I’m currently writing and I think “man, this is crap.” Of course, I keep working on it because I recognize that I ALWAYS think “man, this is crap” at some point before I’m done.  Knowing that doesn’t make it easier, however.

Jason from the FLSR writing group said something interesting about that, however.  He said that writing a draft of a novel is like climbing a mountain: you do it three times.

The first time, you climb it in your mind as you plan it out.  You’re excited and motivated, and busy with all the preparations.

The second time, you actually physically do the work of climbing.  It is long, hard, and frustrating, you get lost a few times, the summit is anticlimactic, and the return is boring.  You can’t wait until you’ve finished and it’s all over.

The third time is when you look back on the experience after you’re safely back down.  No matter how excruciating the climb was, you look back on it fondly and remember all the best parts.  You thrive on the memories and wish that you were back up there, standing on the summit, enjoying the experience.

Right now, I’m on my third climb for Genesis Earth and my second climb for Bringing Estella Home. I can remember how miserable I was when I was still in the middle of Genesis Earth–for a while I seriously thought about throwing the whole thing out and doing something else.  However, now that I’ve been letting it sit for a while, I’m getting really, really excited about it!  I can hardly wait before I can get back and write the second draft.

But that’s not going to happen until I finish Bringing Estella Home.  And, no matter how difficult it gets, I swear I WILL finish this book!  I’m a chapter away from act III, and that’s too deep into the thing to quit and start something else!  This book WILL be finished–if not by April, then by sometime in May!

Star Wars Euphoria

Ok, here’s a funny story.

Sunday, I usually don’t go anywhere, so when I parked my car on Saturday I set it to play the main title of Star Wars as soon as I put the keys in the ignition.  I figured that by the time I needed to drive anywhere, I would have forgotten all about it and it would be a pleasant surprise.

Rewind a couple of weeks.  An old roommate of mine had been wanting to set up a double date with him, me, and our dates to go to the BYU planetarium.  We went a couple of weeks ago, just to check it out, and it was really cool!  Definitely fun.  Also, I’ve got all the stuff to make some really delicious homemade granola, so we could do that as well.  Food, girls, astronomy–how can you go wrong with that kind of a combination?

So then, rewind a little more.  There’s this girl in my FHE group who I’ve been wanting to ask out for a while.  She’s pretty cool, easy to talk with, funny, and interesting.  She sometimes likes to commandeer a booth at Wilk with her friends and put up a sign that says “free advice.”  I had a lot of fun hanging out with her a couple of times this past semester, and she seems really friendly.

Fast forward to yesterday.  My old roommate and I had decided to do this planetarium date thing this Friday, and I figured it would be a great opportunity to ask out this girl from my FHE group.  Of course, during and immediately after FHE there wasn’t much of an opportunity to talk with her, since everyone else was there, but afterwards I went over to my apartment and did dishes for a little while.  I figured I’d drop in on my way out to campus.

Now, I’m a senior at BYU, and I hate to admit it, but I still find it really difficult to ask girls out.  I mean, I’m not as awkward or scared of it as I used to be, but still, it’s not the easiest thing in the world.  I have to work myself up to do it, and even then, there comes a point where you have to stop thinking and just go for it.  The adrenaline builds up,  you’re playing out all the worst case scenarios in your head, and some part of your brain starts coming up with excuses for why you shouldn’t ask right now.

So there I was, finishing up the dishes, trying to work myself up to doing this.  I mean, come on?  Anime characters who are ten years younger than me do this kind of stuff all the time, and half the time they are scrawny misfits!  What does that say about me??  So I threw my stuff in the car, closed the door, and walked over to this girl’s apartment…

…and she said yes!  Hooray!  She seems really interested, too!  Victory!

So then, in this post-adrenaline state of euphoria, I hoped in my car, stuck the key in the ignition, and…

…SHEBAM!! STAR WARS THEME SONG!!!!

Oooh yeah!  Life is good!