No writing yesterday…but there is a reason

Well, as you may notice, I didn’t write at all yesterday.  My wordcount meters are both down significantly, especially the 7 day one.  Grr…I will get them back up before too long!  New goal: get both meters in the red by the end of the week.

However, I have a reason for not writing, and it’s not a lame excuse that such-and-such happened outside my control and I had to put my writing on hold.  It’s a lot more complex than that.

Basically, the scene that I’m stopped at has some graphic content, and I didn’t feel that it would be appropriate to write that scene on a Sunday.  At the same time, I’m starting to wonder if I shouldn’t write this scene at all.  In terms of the story, I think that this scene is necessary, but I can see people taking it the wrong way when they read it.  I can also see myself feeling somewhat embarrassed when my friends read it.  I’m not usually the kind of person that avoids controversy, but this is something where I’m not sure how to proceed.

Basically, here’s what I have in mind: Tristen, the main character, is on a mission to find his birth family.  He’s left behind this futuristic Bedouin camp that’s raised him, except that the sheikh of this camp will do anything to get Tristen to stay.  The first leg of Tristen’s journey is a pilgrimage to this famous temple, and the sheikh sends his daughter with Tristen, ostensibly because she want’s to make the pilgrimage too, but won’t have the opportunity in the future.  Really, though, the girl has conspired with the Sheikh to try and seduce Tristen to convince him to stay.

That’s the background, but it really has nothing to do with this specific scene.  In the scene I have in mind, Tristen and the girl are in a bar/restaurant halfway around the world, way far away from home, when this graphic performance occurs on the stage at this place.  Basically, there is this major religious cult in this part of the world whose priestesses are basically holy prostitutes, like many Ancient Near East goddess cults.

The scene would involve some suggestive nudity and would raise the already existing sexual tension between Tristen and the daughter of this Sheikh.  Basically, he’s been raised in this ultra-moralistic conservative environment, so the dance of this temple prostitute shocks him to the point where he doesn’t know what to think about it.  He gets these images in his mind that he can’t get out, and he feels confused, guilty, passionate, and just…well, weird.  This confusion gets him to the point where he doesn’t know what he’s doing with this girl who’s supposed to seduce him, so that she is able to break through his resistance and almost succeed in getting him to stay (and all that that implies).

Also, I want to throw this scene in to show the moral depravity of the society that Tristen passes through.  By demonstrating just how graphically immoral the mainstream society has become, I’m hoping to show who Tristen really is–a morally upright person.  I want to have this contrast in the story, even if it does mean writing a scene that might cause a lot of LDS readers (and even some of my friends) to throw the book across the room.

So how do I do this?  How can I write a scene that is graphic and yet not pornographic?  What do you think about my ideas here?  What should I do–and not do?  Why?

Destiny

A couple of weeks ago, we started learning about the Seljuk Turks in History 240 (History of the Middle East to 1800).  This band of rugged, horse-riding nomads went from mercenary warriors of some Persian dynasty to the de facto rulers of nearly half the Muslim world.  In an era when radical Shi’ism swept across North Africa and the Levant, and people thought the rise of the Fatimid Empire marked the end of the world, the Seljuks, self-appointed defenders of Sunnism headed the Fatimid conquest at Baghdad and pushed them back to Egypt.  Fascinating stuff!

Then we learned about the Mongol invasion and the sack of Baghdad in 1258, when the world really DID end from the point of view of the Arabs, and I knew that Central Asia would never be boring to me again.

The Turks and the Mongols were both nomadic peoples who lived on the steppes of Central Asia–basically, an enormous stretch of grassland like the prairie in the American Midwest.  These guys lived in camps, with their cattle and horses, and looked down on the thought of settling down in cities and living a civilized, sedentary life.  To them, the nomadic life meant freedom–the people of the cities were voluntary slaves and beneath the hardy nomads.

Genghis Khan, born Temujin (“Genghis Khan” is a title that basically means “ruler of the world”), united the Mongol tribes and built the largest empire the world had ever seen.  Bigger than Alexander’s Hellenist Empire, bigger than the Roman Empire, bigger than the Babylonians, Assyrians, Sassanians, Umayyids, or Abassids.  The Mongol Empire was BIG–it stretched from Korea to the Black Sea!  If it weren’t for the Mameluks (one of the few Arab kingdoms that wasn’t mismanaging itself to death), the Mongols might have swept North Africa and the Mediterranean!

The coolest part of the story was the religious justification behind Genghis Khan’s ruthless, bloodthirsty conquest.  When Temujin was a young boy, the shaman of his tribe told him that the great sky god Tengri had given Temujin the world.  By conquering millions of people, massacring hundreds of cities, and building an empire of blood, death, and fire, Genghis Khan was only fulfilling his destiny!

For the last few weeks, I’ve been practically obsessed with all this history.  It’s fascinating!  Like reading a really good novel–except it’s real life!  Orson Scott Card often says that anyone interested in becoming a writer should study history instead of English in college, and I can see what he means.

All this stuff I’ve been learning about the Mongols has given me dozens of story ideas, many of which I plan on including in my current novel, Hero in Exile.  I’ll write a separate post to explain it all, but basically it involves the Mongol Empire in space.  Just like the Mongols considered themselves the only free people in the midst of sedentary urban dwellers, so the Hamejis in my novel (a spacefaring people who live entirely in their spaceships) consider themselves free in comparison with the billions of people living under continent sized domes across nearly a hundred settled planets.  Just as the sky god Tengri gave Temujin the world, so the god of the epistellar jovian in the Hameji home system has given them the universe.  It is their destiny to take and rule it by blood and fire.  Bwahahaha!

(photos taken from Genghis Khan II by Koei, a 90s DOS game)

Halloween and Nanowrimo kickoff

So, if you checked my blog earlier today, you may have noticed the, um, lack of progress as noted by the speedometers.  Well, all I can say is that yesterday was kind of a special case, it being a holiday and all.

However, it was an awesome Halloween!  I went to work at 10:30 am and started noticing people in costumes, which made me think “hey, today is Halloween…I should get a costume!” (I’ve noticed lately that I’ve been doing things more and more at the last minute, and I don’t know what’s more unnverving: the fact that I’m doing it more often, or the fact that I’m becoming so good at getting away with it).

While chatting with my coworkers in the FHSS writing lab, I decided to dress up as a writer.  After all, the costume shouldn’t be too hard–I am one, after all, right?  Well, it proved to be a lot easier than I’d thought!  Turtleneck sweater, Birkenstocks with socks, a copy of Strunk & White in my pocket–all I really needed was a gray sports coat and a European cap, both of which I got at DI (one I bought, the other I borrowed from a friend I happened to run into at the store).

Properly attired, I was ready to attend the Quark Halloween party!

It was lots of fun!  There were LOTS of costumes this year, nearly twice as many as last year.  Most of the people were some obscure Anime character that I didn’t know about…I’m a nerd, but pretty ignorant when it comes to anime and manga).  I did recognize quite a few of them, though!

A bunch of the guys from the Super Smash Bros tournament dressed up as their favorite characters.  There were three Links, a Princess Peach, a Pikachu, Nes, and a bunch of other characters that I didn’t recognize.  I thought it was really funny how Lunesar (on the right) and his wife dressed up as their favorite characters.  It’s especially ironic because that’s how they met each other–through the Smash Bros tournament.  Hoorah for Geekdom–it’s what brings us together!

I really liked Miriel and her husband’s costumes–Star Wars!  Miriel is on the staff of The Leading Edge and helps us with back issues to give out as prizes for the writing contests.  I really liked her hair in this picture!  She gave me a huge box full of back issues of the magazine at the party, which was really nice–we’d been running short.  With the new box of contest prizes, though, we’re ready to have lots more contests in the months to come!

For the Halloween short story contest, we did something new and experimental: we had a live reading during the actual party.  I was a little bit worried at first, but it worked out really well, I think.  We had the third, second, and first place stories read out loud by their authors.  It wasn’t as visually exciting as watching anime explosions and giant mecha fighting each other, but it was still a treat to hear the stories read out loud, especially the first place winner, The Beauty of Decay.  We actually had a big prize to give out (a $20 gift certificat to the BYU Bookstore), so it was lots of fun!

Aneeka, who won 2nd place, wasn’t there to read hers (since she’s in Germany, and, um, graduated), so we had Gamila, one of the old timers, read it for her.  I briefly told the audience how Aneeka started the writing group, back in the day, and how she was the one who got Jakeson and Gamila to start dating (they’re married now–both were there at the party).  It’s always fun to pleasantly embarass your friends.

So yeah, this writing contest thing is definitely something we should keep on doing!  I just need to convince the rest of the officers to set aside more money for contest prizes.  Everyone who participated got a copy of The Leading Edge, which was motivational I think.  Besides that, the voting was fun as well.  We need more contests–and not just contests, but readings as well!

So that was the Halloween party.  It was basically one of the awesomest Quark socials of the year.  I love this club!

Today, instead of having a writing meeting where we critique each others’ stories, we had a writing party in room 135 of the TMCB instead.  I think it went really well!  We started out with lots of food, chatting, and distracting conversations, but for about an hour-long stretch, there was nothing but writing.  It was pretty cool.  Then, towards the end, I started getting distracted with showing people photos from my photoblog via the overhead projector, but all in all I think it went well.

Today is (was?) November 1st, the first day of nanowrimo!  Sadly, I’m not doing nanowrimo this year–at least, not strictly speaking.  The rules of nanowrimo state that you have to start on November 1st with a wordcount of 0 and end with a wordcount of 50k.  Unfortunately, if I were to freeze all my current projects and focus on something totally new, I’d lose so much time and momentum with the other projects that I doubt I’d meet my goal to have three manuscripts ready for World Fantasy 2009.

Still, nanowrimo is pretty cool, and it’s a good way to connect with the wider writing community, so I’ve decided that even if I’m not strictly going to do nanowrimo this year, I’m at least going to do something in keeping with the spirit of it.  My goal is to get 50k into my current project, Hero in Exile, so that I’ll have a wordcount of 64,500 by December 1st.  It’s going to require more than 1,500 words a day, but I think I can handle it.

At the writing party, I got about 700 words in, and when I transcribed it from my notebook to the word document, I got in about another 300.  Right now, I’m finished with all the buildup, and now I’m poised to go for the jugular: the next scene is going to involve some fighting, explosions, death, and heroics.  I’m excited!

I’ve also got to prepare a Sunday School lesson tomorrow morning, so even though we get to set our clocks back tonight, I think I’d better get to bed now.  So far, the first half of this weekend has been awesome–and since I don’t have to do any homework on Sunday, I think that the second half has the potential to be just as good!

Breaking 1,000

I broke 1,000 words today!  Yay!  That’s my daily wordcount goal from here on out, so it was good to reach it.

Also, the story is coming along nicely.  I can see how my original idea for the scene that was giving me trouble just wasn’t fleshed out enough.  If I’d have gone with it, there would have been less conflict, less development of some key characters (some of whom die soon in the next chapter!  bwahahaha!) and some worldbuilding.

That’s about all for now.  I have a lot more I could blog about…Prop 8, Mongol hordes, history class, schoolwork, craziness…but it’s late and I need to got to bed.  Gnight.

Grr…

Man, I’ve been busy this week.  I have been making progress–750 words isn’t bad, even if it is lower than I’d like–but I haven’t moved past this one scene.  It’s kind of frustrating.

I have the next couple of scenes figured out in my head, and I’m really excited to get to them (they’ve got all kinds of action and explosions and such), but the more I try to get there, the longer and longer the current scene becomes.

It’s not a bad scene.  It’s just…unexpected.  The plan was to quickly show Mira and Tristen entering one of the planetary domes for the first time and their awe at the lush, rolling agricultural land inside.  Instead, it’s morphed into a confrontation with customs and security at the entrance to the dome.

I considered cutting it all out, but as I read over it I realized that it seems to be working.  I sat down tonight, hoping to get past there so I could start tomorrow with the exciting stuff, but now it looks like other characters are getting drawn in.  Grr…

In all reality, though, this is probably a good thing.  The story is starting to take on a life of its own, and the characters are starting to act for themselves instead of having me pull the marionet strings all the way.

At least, that’s what I hope is happening.  I still worry that Tristen is a little too flat.

In the meantime, I saw something interesting on the Publisher’s Lunch email for today.  A minor publisher is offering to give away free books to bloggers who promise to post reviews of the book on their blogs and on Amazon. Free books, eh?

I checked the list of books available to review so far, and it looks like most of them are either non-fiction and/or mainstream Christian, but the concept is very interesting.  If a minor sf/f publisher were to do the same thing, I’d be all over it.

Oh, and this made me laugh today.  I still need to figure out what I’m going to be for Halloween…

Okay, a new direction

I owe a lot to Aneeka.  She is the one who motivated me to write The Phoenix of Nova Terra back in 2007 when I didn’t really think I could finish a novel before the end of the school year.  Like I said in the last post, I’ve hit something of a wall in my writing life recently, and a couple of days ago she was the one who pointed it out to me.  The conversation went something like this:

Empress: lol – okay, okay!
how are your stories going?
me: very slowly
frustrating
mostly just because of personal disorganization
Empress: yeah, that can happen. tired of school? or just a lot of things you want to do?
me: school is pretty easy right now
it’s just hard to get back into writing regularly
I dunno
I’m trying to juggle two projects
Empress: maybe that’s the problem?
it’s hard focusing on two stories at once
(says the girl that does it all the time – the irony!)
but it really is hard to get all focused on two projects at once
me: it probably is
Empress: I flit between projects because I’m not that into them and write because I’ve been inspired (and tend to be inspired on different stories all the time)
when I get into a project though, then it’s best that I leave the rest behind and just focus on that one
get out all that I have and see how far I can go before I get distracted again
me: yeah
I’m trying to be 100% into two projects at the same time
trouble is, I can’t keep the momentum going on both
Empress: yeah. looks like you’re human, after all 😉
me: dangit!
Empress: you should choose one to focus on and then, if inspiration hits for the other one, focus on that one for a bit before turning back to the main project
me: grr
Empress: think of it this way. You could struggle for 6 months trying to work on two projects and arrive halfway done with both
OR you could focus on one project for 6 months, finish it, and then have plenty of energy to finish the next one
me: that’s true I guess
Empress: it’s better than wearing yourself out
then you’ll be left with no project finished
and just a heap of frustrated dreams
me: I guess that’s right
question is, do I revise my old novel or do I go ahead with the new one?
I’m more excited about the new one, but I want to get the old one finished
Empress: how long would the old one take to get finished?
wait…and you’re having problems with them right now, right?
you know, I would think it’s easier to edit two stories then to write two stories at once. maybe you could finish up the new story and then edit both of them at the same time?
me: that’s an idea
Empress: and NaNoWriMo is coming up. you could finish up the first draft by next month and whallah! only have 2 stories to edit 😀
me: ugggggggggggh
I coooooooooould
that’s intense, though
Empress: well, doing two projects at once is intense as well
why not just switch it around and do this kind of intensity instead? 😉

So, after mulling it over for a couple of days, I’ve decided to do things a little differently.

Instead of trying to do two major projects at once, I’m going to put the revision of Phoenix on hold for now and focus all my energy on Hero in Exile.  For November, instead of doing nanowrimo, I’ll try to get 50,000 words deep into this novel instead.  After that, if I do roughly 1,000 words a day, I should be in good shape to finish it before the end of January.  I don’t anticipate this novel going over 120,000 words, and if it tries to, I’ll do my best to reign it in.

So that’s my goal: Finish Hero in Exile before the end of January.  Oh, and write 50,000 words in November.

I’ve noticed that I tend to either be too focused or too distracted.  Trying to balance two projects at the same time has taught me that…well, I can’t do it very well.  But I do know that once I have one project that I can focus on, I can focus on it until it gets done.  That’s what I’m going to do now.

In the meantime, I was chatting with Drek from the writing group, and found out that he could program a way cool widget for my sidebar!  It’s going to be a pair of speedometers that show my daily wordcount and my wordcount over the course of the last seven days.  Oh, and if I’m nice, he might program a widget that displays my writing projects as status bars!  I’m way excited!

Drek recently designed a website for nanowrimo this year.  The idea is that every minute, it displays a new word from his novel.  Something like that.  It’ll be really interesting to see what happens once november starts up.

I can definitely say that the goatee gives Drek programming +2.

A change of direction?

I had a chat with Aneeka yesterday about writing.  She was in London waiting to catch the bus to Scotland at around 4:00 am or so (jealous!), and I was winding down a frustratingly unproductive day.

I told her how I’m trying to divide my attention between two different projects, and she had some interesting things to say.  Basically, she said that if it isn’t working and I’m not getting as much done as I’d like, I should put one project on hold and focus on the other one.

Duh.  Of course that’s the answer.  Trouble is, I’ve been so focused on doing things this way that I haven’t seen it.

So, before this weekend is up, I need to take a step back and figure out just what I’m going to do.  Splitting my attention between two projects really isn’t working at all for me, and if I keep going at this rate I doubt I’ll be half finished with either one by the end of the semester.  Definitely time for an adjustment.

Besides figuring out what I want to do with my writing, I also need to 1) send in my absentee ballot (I’m still somewhat undecided, though Colin Powell’s endorsement of Obama has almost cinched it for me); 2) read Homer’s The Odyssey and write a paper comparing Odysseus to Socrates…for Tuesday (this isn’t as bad as it seems though–The Odyssey is a really interesting story and I’ve enjoyed it a lot so far); 3) get cracking on Tales from the Thousand and One Nights, since I’ve got a book report due in a week and a half, and; 4) various other assorted homeworks.  Blegh!

Oh, and I haven’t asked anyone out on a date in the past month.  Haven’t even thought about it, really.  Dang.  How did time start moving so fast?  The semester is more than half over!

At least I got in a thousand words in Hero in Exile today.  That, and I’ve been working through the next few scenes in my mind quite a bit.  I think I know where I want to take it, even though it has nothing to do with what I wrote down in the plot outline.  I’m excited.

And tired.  More tomorrow.

Updates

This week has been pretty good.  Scholastically, I’ve had two (well, three) midterms, a paper, and other assorted homework.  I managed to pull it off surprisingly well, and now I feel like I have a bunch of free time.  Yay!

I still seem to be in a rough spot, though, with my writing.  It’s starting to appear that this “rough spot” is more than a minor bump.  I don’t know what it is exactly–maybe I’ve overextended myself, maybe I’m just not organizing my time efficiently enough (probably it’s a combination of both)–but I feel like I’m not writing as productively as I could.

It’s not a lack of ideas problem.  I’ve got tons of ideas for my stories.  It’s usually a daily thing where I’ll come up with a new idea for the plot of one of my stories, or a cool thing about the setting.  Thinking up this stuff is the easy part–it’s the writing that’s difficult.

In Phoenix, the trouble is that I’m coming to sections where I have to throw out 90% of what I’ve got so far and synthesize the remainder into something more workable.  That is a very daunting thing.  Yesterday, I only did about two pages before calling it quits.  Today I haven’t even worked on it at all.  Blegh.

Because I’ve been paying so much attention to that project, my other project, Hero in Exile, hasn’t got the momentum it needs to carry through the hard stuff.  I spent three hours of my free time today writing that novel, but in all that time I only got through 1,000 words.  That’s progress, true, but it was very slow and painful.  I don’t know why.

Ugh.  This lack of progress is getting to me.  It doesn’t help that the semester is half over by now.

I’m hoping that once I get through the current slow spot in Phoenix, things will pick up.  I was really surprised when I edited this one scene in like half an hour.  The scene worked largely as it was, I just had to polish it up, and in just about half an hour (or maybe an hour, I forget), I’d run through almost ten pages of manuscript.  Not bad.

I just hope the rest of the novel is like that.  Otherwise, I’m just going to have to start cutting stuff out.

In other news, almost all my friends have read The Hero of Ages, but I’m still in the middle of it.  It’s way good, though!  Very dark and depressing at this point, and most of the characters have almost given up, but not entirely.  Nobody ruin this book for me please!

20% through the rewrite

Well, I don’t know exactly what it means, but yesterday I got to page 117 in the revision of The Phoenix of Nova Terra.  Divide that number by the total pages of the current draft, and you get .20blahblahblah.

So, I guess you could say that I’m roughly 20% through with this revision.  In reality, I have no way to tell–I’m expecting the final wordcount to be significantly smaller than what I have right now, so in terms of pages I might be quite a bit further.  Or, the stuff I have to revise might be a lot more difficult than the stuff I’ve worked on so far, so I might be much further behind than 20%.

Whatever.  It’s a statistic.  Am I having fun doing this?  I suppose…though I wish my life were better organized right now.  20% doesn’t mean much when you consider that the semester is half over.  How in the heck am I going to have three polished novels by November 2009?  Sigh.

On a happier note, I took a midterm today and freaking owned it!  HIST 240, Middle East history up to 1800–I got a 98% on the t/f / multiple choice.  YEAH!  The short answer wasn’t that much harder, either.

Also, this Sunday I decided to just sit down and do my work for a change.  Homework was backed up (which is unfortunate–I really do like to keep Sundays open for non-school non-work related activities), but I got all the stuff finished that needed to be done, and dove into both my novels right afterward.  By midnight, I’d written 500 words for Hero in Exile and revised 6+ pages of Phoenix.  Wow!  Both goals, hit right on the head.  I need more days like that.

When I should be doing other things, I’m reading Mistborn 3: Hero of Ages, and it’s really interesting so far (which is to say that the first five chapters are interesting).  I really enjoyed the first Mistborn book, but didn’t enjoy the second one as much.  However, I think that has to do more with the fact that it’s the middle book of a trilogy, and so most of the conflicts were left unresolved.  Also, the opening section took a lot of time to introduce the characters and the world.  The final book dives right into the action and doesn’t take time to describe anything that readers of the first two books wouldn’t already know.

Speaking of Brandon, I read an interesting post on his website that basically tells what writing was like for him before he got published. I’ve heard his how-I-got-published story a few times now, but I’d never heard about any of this stuff before, and I found it really interesting.  Also, it was really interesting to hear about the struggles and uncertainty that comes along with being an unpublished writer, because…that’s where I am right now.  Or rather, I’m right at the start of the trail, so it’s very good to hear about someone else who went through the woods and made it out to the other side.  I want to know what I can expect for the next five to ten years of my life.

Quick updates

Last night I climbed Y mountain with Steve and Warren, old friends from the Capitol house last year, and Steve’s new roommate Dan.  It was awesome!  More on that later.

However, we left around midnight and didn’t get back around five.  I slept for four hours, went to a Quark writing meeting, then did laundry and slept until dinner with my sisters and brother-in-laws.  Ugh.  Disgusting.

I feel so bad because I have so much stuff that I need to do.  Arabic homework.  History test.  MESA test.  MESA paper.   Poli Sci readings.  Humanities study guides.  None of these is really that hard (except the history test–I’m not sure what to expect there), but they are time consuming.  Time that I didn’t make for myself this past week, so it’s starting to crunch up.

Also, I feel really bad because I didn’t hardly write at all this week.  I got stuck on chapter 6 for Phoenix and that really intimidated me.  I guess I just kept putting it off, until finally I just sat down and wrestled with it until it seemed acceptable.  And as for Hero, I haven’t written in that story for nearly a week.

I don’t know what’s wrong.  I don’t even really know what I’ve been doing that’s taken up all this time.  It kind of sucks, to be honest.

Well, this next week is going to be different.  Once I’ve got the tests and papers behind me (which should be by Monday or Tuesday), I’ll have more time to write and do other things.  I just have to sit down and force myself to get it out.  No more excuses.

Sorry if this post is rambling, but that’s kind of the state I’m in.  I’ll write later (probably tomorrow) about the following things:

  • The hike last night to the top of Y mountain (the TOP of the mountain–it was awesome!).
  • Thoughts and frustrations with Hero in Exile, specifically Tristen’s character and the show-don’t-tell philosophy.
  • A really cool idea that came to me Thursday about creating a far future sci fi universe compatible with Mormon cosmology without crossing genre lines from mainstream to LDS sci fi.  This is one really cool idea, and I am excited to share it and get your thoughts on it.

In the meantime, I’m going to just go to sleep now and hope that I can prepare my Sunday school lesson in the morning.  That, and do my Arabic / study for my tests tomorrow.  Ugh.